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Tanya51 Asked August 2014

My Mom lives with me and has came to a point where she cannot be left alone. Is there any help for me?

I also am struggling to get her bathed. Is there any help out there for me? Mother has middle stage Dementia/Altzheimers.

MaggieMarshall Aug 2014
Oh, about her bathing. Mom couldn't take a bath if her life depended on it. Shower either, although we did have shower bars put up all over the place. I hired a lady who does this for a living to come in once a week and give her a sponge bath in front of the kitchen sink in her wheelchair. Mom likes her a lot. Mom's able to stand and hold onto the counter to make sure she gets squeeky clean, and gets her hair washed with a very wet washcloth, shampoo, and a big turkish towel around her shoulders. Works like a charm. $30. It was a nightmare before I got this lady, by the way. "No!!!!" became her mantra. Ha!

MaggieMarshall Aug 2014
If mom has assets, it's time to start spending them for some help. Eyerishlass got it right for sure. We use Comfort Care in our area -- suburban Chicago. $22 an hour for great people.

One other thing I'll mention. And, by the way, mom lives with me, has dementia, and absolutely cannot be left alone. That's Senior Day Care. I send mom one day a week to a place a few miles from our home. It's $66 a day; they provide a mid-morning snack, a healthful lunch, and afternoon treat. Lots of activity, doggy visits, and plenty of people-watching for mom. I also use a taxi to take her and pick her up. So MY free day starts when she goes out the door. She pays for that out of her rainy-day savings.

I'm her POA and an only child. I use her money liberally to make her life better. That, after all, is exactly why she saved it.

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Eyerishlass Aug 2014
Since your mom can't be alone and you still have to carry on with your life with errands and appointments and such you might have to consider in-home help with a caregiver. I recommend going through an agency as opposed to someone who works on their own. You can get a caregiver a few hours a day or just a few hours a week. The agency will help you with the schedule to suit yours and your mom's needs. Usually there's a 2-hour minimum. If you schedule it specifically, a caregiver can give your mom a bath or shower. She may be embarrassed to have you do it and may feel more comfortable with a professional.

Do you have family support? Siblings? An aunt or uncle? Now is the time to enlist their help if they're willing.

Caring for someone with dementia is very challenging, take all the support you can get. This website is a great resource for support and information.

notrydoyoda Aug 2014
Check with a local home health agency.

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