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roseluz1 Asked September 2014

Can we get Medical POA for our Dad (75) even though he is still married? (not our mother)

Our 75 year old father has some serious health issues and has recently been hospitalized...we, his children, (from first marriage) want to have medical POA for him....is it possible if he's married to his second wife?

vegaslady Sep 2014
Jeanne is correct, as usual. Pam....????

jeannegibbs Sep 2014
What does he want? Is he willing to assign POA to you? If he is still lucid, you cannot force him into a facility against his wishes. But having POA will make it easier for you to act on his behalf if he wants to avoid going home to the hoarding situation.

It is likely that his doctor will order some rehab for him (assuming that is appropriate) and this will give you more time to sort out the long-term options.

What is your relationship with his wife? Is there anything you can do to help her? Does she have adult children who will look after her?

But the very first consideration is What does your father want?

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roseluz1 Sep 2014
Our dad is still lucid. So I guess that's good...he doesn't live in a stable environment with his wife...it's actually quite dangerous for them. (hoarder status). When he is discharged from the hospital, we don't want to go back to those living conditions...we would like to place him in a rehab/skilled facility...any suggestions how we approach this?

jeannegibbs Sep 2014
Sure it is possible. Medical POA (or healthcare proxy) is authorized by the principal -- the person who wants/needs an agent to act on his or her behalf. So if your father wants to name one of his children as his POA (financial and/or healthcare) he may certainly do so, whether he is married or not.

If he can no longer understand the concept of authorizing someone else to act on his behalf, then it is too late for him to assign POA to a child (or anyone else). Or if he does not want to have a child to act on his behalf, that, of course, settles the matter.

A person can name any willing adult to act on his or her behalf. It doesn't have to be a relative.

What are your father's wishes in this matter?

pamstegma Sep 2014
NOPE. The wife has first rights, followed by the adult children. Tell it to the Judge.

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