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CECE111 Asked September 2014

My loved one can only urinate while laying in his bed with a urinal. Any alternatives?

He does all most all of his urinating at night so there are up to 3 urinals at his bedside in case I sleep through the night I usually wake up and check on him and empty urinals if needed. For some reason in the middle of night he decides he is going to empty one into the other and spills making a big mess of spilled urine. When I ask him what happened he always replies with "I DON'T KNOW" Does he really NOT know what he is doing? It seems he know exactly what he is doing since the room is light with a night light and has an empty one on the table. I know this because I have cameras and I see him moving his blankets to prevent them from getting wet. I feel like he deliberately does this when I sleep through the night to punish me for waking up and checking on him. I almost never sleep thru the night. I feel am entitle to sleep thru the night if my body is tired and needs it, The last time I threatening with diapers and it stopped. I haven't insisted on diapers but if this keeps up the carpet will have to be ripped out and flooring will have to be replaced. Any alternatives PLEASE ADVISE.

freqflyer Sep 2014
I am just trying to picture how your hubby is doing this.... I assume since it is the carpet that gets wet that he is sitting up on the side of the bed, and that is when he is transferring the urine from one container to another?

If the carpet is getting wet in the same area over and over, go to a pet store and get large dog pee pads and place them on the rug. I don't know if the pads would be slippery underfoot if your husband decides he wants to get out of bed. You'll have to experiment.

One can also order *blue sheets* from medical supply houses that also work just as well and are a lot cheaper, especially if you can order "seconds" which are brand new sheets but not 1st quality in appearance, but who sees them anyway. I used them for a very dear elderly pet and what a time saver.

I really doubt your husband is doing this deliberately... as we all know how we can get disoriented when we wake up in the middle of the night... and for transferring liquid from one container to another, maybe he is thinking the other container is the toilet for some reason. Is he taking any type of sleeping pill? Some can have unusual side effects.

jeannegibbs Sep 2014
Why does he need to pee so much at night? Have you discussed this with his doctor?

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jeannegibbs Sep 2014
Why would he be punishing you, CECE? Is there a problem in your relationship? Does he blame you for his impairments? Is there any logical reason for him to pour out of one into another? You mention thinking he is mad because you check on him. What happens if you stop checking on him? (Other than by camera?)

Does he have any other signs of cognitive impairment? How is his memory? Is he mostly rational and logical during the day, or are there problems? I'm sure you know that stroke can often be followed by dementia.

Other than getting a remnant piece of linoleum and putting it on that area of the floor to make cleanup easier, I don't know what to suggest about the pee problem.

But, are you managing his care all alone? Do you have someone who comes in and gets him dressed and ready for each day? An afternoon companion? A bath aide? ANYONE who helps you out? Because this sounds like too much for one person to handle, especially if that person isn't getting a good night's sleep regularly.

How long ago did the stroke occur? What other caregiving options have you considered?

My heart goes out to you. This must really be a struggle!

CECE111 Sep 2014
I guess I didnt state that he suffered a stroke to right side and is unable to stand at all and use of only left hand and is wheelchair bound. He has 3 large urnials but only will use them once that is why we have 3 at bedside. I do sleep in a different room I check on him almost every night except maybe and I do mean maybe once a week. (I sure miss sleeping thru the whole night) I feel he is punishing me because pours urine into the the empty urnial knowing he will spill because he only has use of one hand so I will have a mess to clean up on carpet in morning. My first priority when my eyes open is to check on him and empty the urinals.

jeannegibbs Sep 2014
Your profile doesn't say what is wrong with your loved one. Why can't he get up and go to the bathroom? Mobility problems? Why does he only pee at night? Is he on diuretics? Does he have dementia? Other cognitive impairments?

A larger urinal seems like a good solution. There might be more that could be done, depending on the situation.

pamstegma Sep 2014
There are 3 liter urinals with handy tubes for bedtime. Search "GoPilot"

freqflyer Sep 2014
You need to do what my Mom does with my Dad... Dad refuses to wear Depends, so when he messes up the floor/carpet, he has to help her clean it. He still doesn't wear them but he makes a faster run to the bathroom

Some people don't want to be blamed for doing something... so they use that old "I don't know" answer to get out of it. Guess a ghost made that mess... [rolling eyes].

As for sleep, would it be possible to sleep in another room? There is nothing wrong with doing that unless you need to keep one eye opened to make sure your loved one is safe. I do separate beds and have for years as my sig other is a night owl and he kicks when he finally does go to sleep... he knows I need a full night's sleep so he doesn't mind the separate rooms, especially since I snore :P

MaggieMarshall Sep 2014
Darn it. EDIT!!!! Here's the link:

drugtestsinbulk/medline-male-urinal-p-829.html?gclid=Cj0KEQjwyrqgBRDepamt-LWA2oABEiQAV7nwwG_q-uosEw1Z6Jbv3IwBdOZWS-zB5IofjkUyaR1fn0kaAkR88P8HAQ

MaggieMarshall Sep 2014
Get him a different kind of urinal. Just one. Bigger. Here's one that holds 32 oz. $10 for six of them. If he needs a capacity larger than 32 oz., it's time for a talk to the doctor. ;)

Your husband isn't doing it on purpose.

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