Where to find an attorney who is on the side of the caregiver?

An "elder attorney" will be on the side of the elder.
What we really need is "family caregiver" attorneys. These attorneys would/should honor our sacrifices and protect us from crucifixion by those individuals with criminal intentions toward us and/or our loved ones. We try to protect our parents and place ourselves in jeopardy doing so.
How can this be possibly be right? Where is the justice in all of this?
I'm getting really tired of being perceived as a sacrificial lamb!!!!!

Give a Hug brings up a very good point that I'd like to address. How do we know we are in too deep? Most of us are rescuers who put ourselves last. I was advised to keep a journal of how much I did to help my father and handicapped sister every day but who has time to write? So I developed my own way of making it easier by giving numbers to every daily service I provided such as making dinner, washing sheets, cleaning their quarters, making calls, typing letters, picking up prescriptions, doctor visits, and much more as you all know. I also used the many face icons found on my mobile phone to reflect my feelings over the course of the day. When they first came to live with me I was hopeful and positive but after several emergency trips to the hospital and a neglected molar that turned into a painful abscess and blood infection, I realized I was neglecting myself and the results were devastating. Not only did I require expensive root canal and a cap that I could not afford but my overall health had been seriously compromised. Underweight and feeling weak, I pulled out my daily planners for the past seven years and noticed a disturbing pattern of increasing negativity and sad faces that were impacting on my quality of life. I found myself emotionally flatlining and knew it was depression. At this point I wasn't doing my elderly father, disabled sister or myself any favors. In addition, financial agreements, prepared by a respected, experienced elder attorney, made years before for their living/care arrangements within my home were not being honored causing me a financial hardship. Because my father was competent, my POA could not help me and pressure from another older sibling intimidated my very gentle, easily influenced, elderly Dad. So they are now living with my eldest son who is taking his turn at caretaking and experiencing the same difficulties.

Destroyed, are you in the US? Do you mean the lawyer was found ODed or the caregiver?

Your description of this woman's behavior and her false accusations is an example of how important it is to realize one is over their head in care giving. And to step away.

Well, to be objective, OD'ing on drugs does not work well as a defense. I would tend to believe the patient has driven the caregiver over the edge and both need to be separated. Time and time again we will tell people to walk away and save their own life. Unfortunately they are co-dependent to the point of self-destruction. 30% of caregivers die before their patient, because they can't let go. Dementia is a vortex, a black hole that can suck you in unless you grab a life line and get OUT.

The responses were noted. Video was taken. It was not allowed in court. Investigation? Apparently the investigation was poorly conducted by those not well educated and/or on the side of corruption. The woman with the false accusations is extremely mentally ill and the obvious signs of dementia, self neglect, animal abuse as well as previous false 911 calls to put her children in jail for false accusations. This woman has now gone 8 years without bathing. This woman does not have running water in her home. This woman had 23 cats, she killed 3 since the arrest. This woman walks on her roof. This woman sits on her front lawn and cuts the grass with manicure scissors. This woman smears here feces on her daughter. Now if any of you can say that the types of behavior I have mentioned are considered a normal, well thinking and acting individual you too should be employed by APS, the police department, the courts, etc. As for hiring an attorney, after he took all the money, pictures, videos, and evidence to prove innocence, and he was found overdosed on methamphetamines in a motel. Elder abuse cases reap great financial rewards to a corrupt legal system. This case cost over $50,000 and still counting.

Once the elder is paranoid and delusional, you either need a nanny cam to protect yourself, or a lot of witnesses who support you. When caring for someone runs a high risk of damage to your reputation, your legal standing and your credit rating, it's time to hand them over to memory care.
When mom started yelling and throwing things at rehab and demanding her walker with intent to hobble back to her house, I alerted the head nurse.
The MD came in and Rx'd the happy pills. Problem solved.
Chemical restraint is better than a posey at the nurses' station.

An attorney is usually on the side of the person who is paying the legal fees.

If I rob a bank and get caught and get an attorney, the attorney will be paid to represent me. It doesn't matter if I'm guilty. Everyone is entitled to representation.

Before the case goes to trial, you can be absolutely certain there's been a thorough investigation. If you've done nothing against the law, you won't ultimately be prosecuted. District Attorneys don't want to prosecute innocent people if for no other reason than it hurts the numbers by which their successful/failure is judged.

If I were a person being falsely accused of a felony, I would wait until the trial date was set to hire an attorney. In the meantime, I'd probably be comfortable pro se (in other words, representing myself).

If, on the other hand, I were guilty of the charges, I would hire an attorney immediately.

Nobody wants to be falsely accused especially when you are knocking yourself out and it goes unappreciated. I've been there and can identify with the feeling of frustration and betrayal. For seven years I took care of an elderly father and physically,mentally and emotionally impaired older sister. The two of them, along with another older greedy sibling, who never lifted a finger to help, formed a hate campaign against me, casting aspersions against my fine reputation as a state mediator. It is not my style to give advice. I prefer to brainstorm options with the other party; but, in this case I'll make an exception with the desire to help you protect yourself. If you have a smart phone, start recording incidents as they happen. I carry my phone everywhere since it records voice and video. I also set up a Baby monitor in their quarters,at first to hear my father's middle of the night calls for help but later found it useful to hear my disabled sister's temper tantrums when she wasn't getting her own way. Next to the baby monitor in my bedroom was a voice activated tape recorder. Actually I can't take credit for that one since it came from a physical therapist ordered by hospital doctor following dad's several brief stays. The PT was on the receiving end and witnessed my sister's temper tantrums first hand because she doesn't like "outsiders" in her space. This temporary attempt at in-home professional health care (excellent I might add) not only relieved me of backbreaking responsibilities but provided witnesses who write reports for their agency. In addition, I began discussing my care taking concerns with an attorney in our county Office of Aging. Locate all local state/federal agencies,along with church and community groups that offer free services. See where I'm going with this? Hope I've been helpful and remember…You Are Not Alone. Good Luck!

sounds like you need to find a really good Elder Attorney. I did not see where you were from but I have one now (thanks to this site for information) that is helping me with my father's assets (no false stuff), but I am sure the elder attorney has dealt with those kind of things also.