Is it time for a permanent change? Mother developed a septic infection and ended up in the hospital for 5 days. She was very weak and is now in a rehab facility. She did not want to go there, but I told her she could not come home unless she was back on her feet again. (I have been living with mom and providing care for last year.) Her mobility is limited due to arthritis and various other problems but she should be able to get from bed to bathroom and back and from bed to chair and back. I am disabled myself with balance issues and can not risk both of us getting hurt if she needs more assistance with moving.
She is very negative with therapists and quite rude ("the fat one with the red hair"...) I told her she needs to reach the goals if she wants to come home but each day she seems to do less. I had to get the therapy people to write down specific goals...Don't they know this is what is needed?
It has been nice in some ways having mom in a rehab place, (I actually stayed at my own home for the past week!), but it is hard to let go of the control - What meds are you giving her? How come she is not in a proper recliner when her feet need elevating? Have you considered increasing this or that?
And I do worry about her safety...nice place but not as responsive as I had hoped nor as "senior savy" as I expected.
We went to an activity on another floor - actually the locked floor - and mom enjoyed the singing but I ended up running the activity as they had too little staff for the group and one of the other residents took a tumble when she tried to bolt.
I have tried to only visit in short spurts once in am and once in pm if my son (her grandson) can't visit. but running back and forth is tiring too.
Suggestions? Tips? Positive thoughts? Do you think counseling could help?
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If your mom is like my mom (and I don't know that she is), that will help her decide to go into assisted living. Good luck and keep us posted!
Will talk with mom about assisted living again...and the benefit of her being around others. She has enjoyed attending daily mass and has every meal with others. I have enjoyed just visiting and being a almost just a daughter for a change!
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We need to stop and think, for every 1 year an elder gets older, it is more like 5 years they have aged. I see that with my parents, I remember when they both use to walk 2 miles a day just 6 years ago.... now Dad [93] can barely get down his driveway to get the mail using a rolling walker.