Should I correct Mom when she mis-remembers events from her past and the people involved?

Thanks for your suggestions & opinions. We are going to see her neurologist SOON! She seemed to be holding her own until a week or so ago. Nows its answer the same question a gazillion times (smile). I agree also with not correcting her b/c it does make her realize shes slipping away. The only corrections I make are when she says "Mike" instead of "you" for example she said Mike did I nice job trimming the Christmas tree, I says yes I did. I'm trying to keep the mindset that if it doesnt harm her or anyone to let it go. A ham sandwich for breakfast? Sure why not, at least shes eating, thank God she still has a healthy appetite.

My father has done this for years now and I just let it go.In 1960 JFK ride by in a motorcade. The story morphed into my father advising JFK and helping him win the election. Lol
At one point you have to lighten up and tell yourself that they are becoming children again. So, let them have their memories no matter how fictitious they are

I am glad that Mike brought this up.... I noticed my Dad [93] is getting mixed up at time when it comes to people and time frames, this happens once in a great while.

The other day Dad said he plans to put together a trust fund that includes a college education for his brother's children.... I told Dad that his brother's children are ready to retire so chances are slim that they would want to leave home to attend the college that he attended. They are in their 50's and 60's. Oh? Then Dad said on he meant his brothers grandchildren. Again, Dad wasn't clear on the time frame as most of his brother's grandchildren are either in the college of their choice or married with children.

I know I shouldn't correct Dad, but the OCD in me will kick in. I need to just bite my tongue.

Agree with everything above. Yes it is part of normal aging to have minor memory lapses,but not to completely confuse situations from the past. I do say "Yes" when my grand daughter says "Mum?' but that is because they sound alike and I can't see through walls. I also can't find my keys or glasses on a regular basis but that's not dementia. Being constantly corrected would be extremely annoying and mostly pointless as she will only forget again the next time she tells a story. Try and make her part of the team as much as possible. Try the "would you allow me to..........?" approach rather than " I am going to take you to......" That allows her to make the decision and not feel pressured. If you have to explain the benefits when she is unsure then that's the way to go or just don't do it.

Don't correct her. Ask for a neuropsych workup. We found a geriatric neurologist with a team-- social work, neuropsychologist, nurse practitioner at a major rehab center. They did extensive (2 day) testing and diagnosed Mild Cognitive Impairment and also discovered through imaging that mom had had a previously undetected stroke. It helped us understand her anxieties and lack of ability to handle decision making of even the most basic things.

Any doctor familiar with dementia will not call it normal aging when you are truly looking for answers and want a diagnosis. As far as correcting your mom, if you can develop a relationship of protection with her hopefully she will allow you to provide the correct information as assistance once she acknowledges her memory is failing. Down the road you might also want to try different approaches, probelm-solving aloud, and offering multiple-choice situations where she is allowed to feel comfortable using her own judgement even if she's going to be wrong. I find it's still good for my mom's self-esteem when she makes the right choice. Also, I want her to know we are a team and she shares control, she loves it if I say I am not sure of something or I don't have the answer, and I find it's made things go much smoother during those times when she has had to allow me to be the one in control with the better judgement.

I don't think I'd let her doctor get away with that. How thoroughly did he investigate her? It depends on whether this is an abrupt change or not, only of course then you're into the realm of "how abrupt is abrupt…" If you can easily persuade her to pop along to a memory clinic or the equivalent and get checked out, that's what I'd do.

In terms of everyday conversation, only correct her if matters (it hardly ever does). You can do this most tactfully by continuing the anecdote or conversation or whatever, substituting the correct persons for the ones she's got wrong, and all being well she'll then follow suit.

I would make sure she has a good check-up and has her urine checked for a urinary tract infection (UTI) and also have her thyroid, vitamin D and B12 levels checked - and just a good blood panel work-up in general. If all of that came back ok, then you're probably just working with normal aging (how old is your mom?).

I agree that there's no reason to correct her, unless her incorrect memory is somehow making a difference.

What would be the point of correcting her mistake? How will that help anything? You might ask for clarification if you really don't understand her, or if she is telling a story to outsiders and it is important that they know who is really involved you inform them afterwards or quietly during the conversation. But most of the time, to keep correcting her is cruel, in my opinion. It makes her feel bad and it doesn't change anything.

Maybe this is normal aging. Maybe it is something to be concerned about. The best you can do now is keep an eye on it and see if changes or gets drastically worse.

My mother has always been terrible with names. She often has called me by the wrong name, since childhood. I'm lucky she usually used a sister's name and seldom one of my brother's! So for her getting names mixed up was not a sign of dementia -- it was just more of same. (She does have dementia, and there are lots of other signs.)

It is hard to say whether your mother is just getting names mixed up, or truly is forgetting who was involved. If she calls you by your uncle's name but clearly knows you are her son that is different than her thinking that she is talking to her dead brother. Does that make sense? Forgetting names is less serious than mixing people up.

After a head injury, my husband would often say he was in a high school. Was he really that severely confused, or was he just not able to bring up the word "hospital"? No one could say for certain. We just had to wait and see how things developed.

I think you are in "wait and see" mode. If things become more serious, go back to the doctor or a different doctor. But meanwhile, please don't correct her unless it would really make a difference in her actions.

Let it go. Talk to her MD while she is in the potty or in another room and get him to tell you the truth. Keep that conversation in confidence, don't tell mom "doc says you are slipping" because she will fire him, and go find another MD that will agree with her.
Mom's MD always tells her how great she is doing. On the side he agrees with us, that she is safer at Assisted Living, and cannot be living alone, cannot manage her own meds. If you bring this up with her in the room, she will be madder than a wet hen. Talk to the MD privately, and lay it on the line.

How old is your mother?

Has she been tested for Alzheimer's/Dementia? If not then, that would be my first stop. Seems to me it came along rather quickly and that's not normal.

For now I personally wouldn't correct her, just go with the flow but make sure you get her a complete medical work-up.