My mother turned 60 in January but since about October she started acting like a spoilt child when she didn't get her own way. She seems to have lost the ability at time to construct a sentence, can't answer the simples of questions, hums away to herself and makes strange moaning noises when she's sitting doing nothing. She has been to the doctors & hospital (battle to get her to attend) and had a brain scan but came back clear, more appointments to follow. My mums health seems to have gone down hill rapidly when things happen, for example, didn't speak to me for weeks when she found out I was planning on buying a house 400 miles away, still having issues with her not talking and my dad had to step in and take over the shopping as she just didn't seem to be coping with just a basic task, this resulted in a childish response of I want a divorce (seems to be one of her favourite phrases as says it constantly at times), my dad majority of the time can't have a proper conversation with her, I constantly hear him repeating himself or say listen and eventually gives up. Give my dad is dues he started typing things on the computer for her to read but when she doesn't like what is being said she says "shut up" and walks away. Problem is my mum was my dads carer as he suffers from chronic fatigue but since this has happened by dad is trying to look after her but it's starting to have an effect on him, constantly looks withdrawn, tired and at times gives into her to get some peace, her behaviour is so bad that since Christmas my dad hasn't been able to sit down an watch a full program because she constantly gets into stuff and can't really go anywhere without her. My mum still does cooking, cleaning, washing the basic house stuff (my dad has to keep an eye on her though) but she has an obsession with opening the main doors (constantly saying my brother is at it) to the property. My worry is she opens the doors and it's dark outside and announces no one is at the door. My dad can't keep up with her at times when she gets it in her head someone is at the door. This evening for instance she had the front door opened three times within about 10 minutes and every time no one was at the door, my dad was having a quick bath and I was trying to have a sleep as had just come off a day shift to go and do a night shift driving, I removed the front and back door keys but within about an hour she had found her keys and was back trying to unlock the door, I physically had to remove the keys from her which results in "I want my keys" "I'm phoning the police". I am trying everything to stop her opening the door as I deem it unsafe as in this stain age anyone could see and she could open the door one time and be attacked (possibly never happen but better to be safe than sorry), cause my mum goes on and on about wanting keys my dad gave her his keys (not happy about this) and within 5 minutes she back trying to open the door. Regardless if keys are in the door she still goes to the door and pulls at the blind and shouts open the door, she can even be in bed and will shout constantly open the door. A few days ago I came in off a night shift at 4:30am and my mum was up (she even screamed as she didn't expect me to be coming up the stairs) later in the day I asked my dad if he had heard mum screaming and he said no, this backed up my argument that he should stop putting the keys back in the door at night time as she could get up and open the door in the middle of the night and he would be unaware of it. I'm aware he puts them back in case of a fire but think the fact my mum keeps randomly opening the door that till this issue is resolved then they need to stay out for her safety. Has anyone been through this situation or one similar? Any advice would be greatly appreciated as not sure what I should do next. My dad keeps saying that cause he's caring for my mum that it's his decision what happens to her but I disagree as he isn't coping and due to that could put her at risk.
6 Answers
Helpful Newest
First Oldest
First
ADVERTISEMENT
This is medical in nature, not your mom just acting like a spoiled child. She is psychotic by definition, having delusions and hallucinations and acting on them as if they are real. Medication side effects, vitamin deficiency, illicit drug use or prescription painkiller or alcohol abuse are all possibilities if nothing is structurally wrong with the brain. Frontal lobe epilepsy could possibly look something like this. Just an infection or untreated pain could be making things worse too if there was already some underlying compromise of brain function.
Please don't let people blow this off as "bad behavior." This might require inpatient hospitalization rather than just a series of appointments that she will resist keeping given this escalating severity and the dangerousness of the situation. Trust your assessment on that. Time to make sure POA papers and HIPAA consent forms are in place probably with your dad as her spouse but with you as the backup if that has not already been done, in case this proves to be something irreversible. At this stage, with it going on for just a month, it might not be - but it can be important to act quickly for many of the things that could be going on.
Does she have any other medical conditions (high blood pressure, diabetes) that might be causing some of the symptoms? Are these behaviors totally new, or has your mom always had minor variations of some of these behaviors and they're just getting worse? Is she on any medications that might be causing some of these behaviors? Tell us more (even though you've told us a lot already).