Everyone except one sibling have left me to care for my mother and they said I have ran everyone anyway. Any suggestions?

Boy that really depends. Every family has their own complicated issues.If your siblings would agree I would try and find a counselor to facilitate a few meetings where you all could voice your perspectives and opinions. A place where no one is boss and all are respected.

We as Caregivers tend to be a little strict on schedules and what not, and then when someone wants to just pop in or ask questions after we have been left to our own devices and are able to cope anyway "They" like to blame us and say we are the reason they don't come but in all actuality it is their own selfishness that keeps them away...

Perhaps they do not want to do any caregiving and are blaming you. This is the hallmark of narcissism, shifting the blame to make the other person appear at fault. Unfortunately, there are quite a few narcissists in this world, and it is a very real personality disorder. I am not saying this is what is happening in your situation, but it is a possibility.

My mother has aphasia from a stroke and has very limited speech skills. She does just fine in the nh. They understand her needs better than I do!

Only one sibling wants nursing home. My mother cannot talk due to stroke so at this stage nursing home won't work because she cannot verbalized her needs

I see from your profile that your mother has Alzheimer's/Demetria.... as you may already know that disease will only get worse and worse. Have the siblings suggested that your mother be placed in a continuing care home so that she will be cared for by 3 shifts of caregivers instead of just one person? But you refuse. That could be one reason your siblings have backed away.

When I complain when they are late when I have a personnel appt. or if I say something to them that they don't like most respond to me with. " if you keep talking to me like that I will leave and you will be on your own"

What do they say that you did to run them away?

It can be hard to delegate when you're the main caregiver. Other may mean well when they take mom for fast food (but then she'll have digestive problems YOU have to deal with) or tell her family gossip (but then you have to deal with her fretting over those problems ).

More information will get you better advice!