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malloryg8r Asked May 2015

Any advice on restricted visitors during short term AL stay?

My spouse & I are going on a 2nd honeymoon so I am in process of finding an AL for mom, to take care of her for about 2 wks. Things are not good between my sibs and me. They are very jealous that mom has me as her DPOA. I am anxious that they will visit her in the AL while we are away on our 2nd honeymoon, and persuade her to change her POA, and Will, or to give them money. In the past she has too easily given them money, jewelry, keys to her house and allowed them to drive her to her bank, where she withdraws $200 or $500 cash and gives away to them. I just don't want any of that happening while I am away. My question is, can I ask the AL to prohibit visitors? I don't currently have a doctor saying she is incapacitated, should I get that evaluation taken, before we leave? Because then she would not be able to change her POA or Will. I feel like I'm walking a tightrope, between letting her live her life as she wishes and being too overprotective. But isn't this what a DPOA is supposed to do, be almost "overprotective? Appreciate any and all viewpoints.

terryjack1 May 2015
In AL, unless your mom is not capable she has the right to have visitors. As her representative you can specify that she is not allowed to go out away from the facility with anyone. You can contact the bank and let them know you are going out of town, if there are any issues you can have them to call you. I can understand your concern, if you feel it's in mom's best interest not to have siblings visit while you are away then you must do what you are supposed told. You don't state what mom's mental status is only that you don't have a dr. certification that she is incapable. You might want to speak with an attorney regarding your DPOA to make sure it can't be changed upon incapacity of your mom. Good luck.

pamstegma May 2015
You call the bank and freeze the accounts while you are away. You alert the facility to NOT let anyone remove her from the premises, and why. Put it in writing to the facility. Take away the keys to houses and cars and remove credit cards and jewelry to a lock box. You really do need to consider getting a legal Guardianship done.

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Chicago1954 May 2015
I doubt if the AL would do that. They do not check IDs of who comes in and out.
I guess i wouldn't tell my sibs where she is.

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