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Abby1912 Asked June 2015

How to let spouse know he needs to go to a day care program 9-3?

This is to help with his Alzheimer's and not be alone during my work hours. I have checked with a place called Colonial Club that would work for him. Also gets picked up and dropped off at home each day. Right now spouse just sits watching TV with dog most of day and otherwise naps while I am gone. Can fix his lunches by himself. Has not driven his truck since December. Is quite passive and follows me everywhere when not at home. Was very handy. Now not and exhausted fast.

Sunnygirl1 Jun 2015
It depends on the stage and the existing reasoning ability of your husband. I found that even when my loved one was in the moderate stage, reasoning about things that were good for her was not an option. She could not handle it. I would state what we were doing and then do it. For example, we going to the doctor's office. Let's put on your shoes now. In 5 minutes we were out of the door. That's the only thing that worked.

lsmiami Jun 2015
Do not be afraid to approach the subject. It is a good thing for both of you. It has worked well for people on this board. Be confident....that may help your "sale"

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jeannegibbs Jun 2015
Some refer to these programs as a club. "I've found a club that you might enjoy. You could try it out starting next Monday. They have games and a story time and groups that play cards and sometimes live entertainment." Mention the things you think he would like.

My husband wasn't too keen on going but he still had enough reasoning ability so I could tell him, "I am doing everything I can to keep you at home with me. I need your help with having some time I can count on to make appointments for myself, run errands, and do my work. By going to this program a few hours a few times a week you can give me this time." And he really did enjoy several aspects of it, and I think it was good for him.

I sure hope the Colonial Club works out for you!

Chicago1954 Jun 2015
Do not introduce the idea, too soon - if he will fret about it. I might ask "Can you go to your appointment today, if a driver comes and gets you? I will pick you up."

GardenArtist Jun 2015
How can you put a positive spin on approaching the issue so that he thinks it's the best option for him?

More about him would help; what stage is his Alzheimer's? Can he converse and make friends? Did he used to enjoy socializing? Things like this will help - as you want to make him feel this is the best option for him while you're gone.

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