Are there activities that can keep my father-in-law with dementia engaged as sometimes he gets irritable?

With FIL, he didn't feel that simple toys were only for children, as MIL does. She won't color, play with puzzles or anything!

FIL enjoyed a harmonica, simple keyboard with preprogrammed songs too, a triangle, snapapart beads designed for children, wooden puzzles (jigsaws were beyond his capability) colorforms, matching the cards type games. A pinwheel kept him blowing increasing his breathing. If I think of anything else, I'll let you know.

All the suggestions made were on point, some i need to use myself with my mother. In my experience with my mother, when she was in assisted living and now back at home with us, sure watches and listens to music from older eras. Try TCM, TURNER CLASSIC MOVIES, station if it's available in your area. Also just to have her feel involved and do things she once could do in her sleep, try household chores such as folding laundry, vacuuming, washing dishes. If your FIL is physically able, we take brief walks and go to some of her fav stores in the past and just walk around and browse like we used to spend time together....

tinyurl/d3zdpuk Things To Do Together, CareGivers In-home Activities Hundreds of links to sites offering games and things to do for Alzheimer's and Elder Care Caregiver providing InHome care.

InHome Activities for Carers mainzone website
Activities for Caregivers and AD Clients should be considered as a part of a complete care program unless they are objected to by the client.

A few more ideas for your consideration:
Give FIL a deck of cards (or part of one) Ask him to put all the red cards in one pile. (or Black or picture cards, etc)
Have him help fold laundry - face cloths and hand towels work best. (Actually, memory care places have a bin of items used just for this purpose)
One center had a video/DVD of music from the 20s - 40s with the words in large type on the screen for a sing-a-long.
ANYTHING that FIL did in his younger days works. Singing - old songs, playing catch out on the lawn with a larger ball, a tossing game - use a bean bag type thing and set out circles (embroidery rings) and have a toss at the rings. It helps focus, creates moderate movement and my Mom was SO-o competitive, she really took it seriously!
Little outings (SHORT) can help create action for dementia sufferers. A trip Walk or wheel chair through a park. Watching a few innings of a little league game, visiting a play ground and watching the children on the swings, etc. We used to take my Mom to an ice cream parlor - where she could sit and eat a cup after looking at the flavors (You'll likely have to make a decision for him as this might go on forever : - )). Did anyone mention puzzles yet? BUT one with large and a limited number of pieces. Start with 12 and see how he does. Hope this sparks some ideas.

Thank you all for tips. I found one activity from some of posts mentioned about counting buttons. Since I did not have buttons handy, asked him to count clothes pegs . Gave him clothes clips or pegs in small bowl and asked him to count and put in another bowl. He keeps doing for some time although not for long.
Other point mentioned by you about old albums am going to check now.
He does not seem interested in watching movie but have not tried old movie - have to try that.
One thing have understood is that only people who are facing this on daily basis like you all will be able to share their experience and assist.
Thanks Mohan

Dementia and incontinence go together. Adult depends are good. At night insert a Serenity Pad. A bedside commode makes things easier for the patient and reduces the likelihood of a fall that might happen trying to get to the bathroom.

Boredom is so cruel. As we age, our physical limitations also limit mental stimulation that we would otherwise get by gardening, or taking a quick walk. Dementia robbed my mom of being able to concentrate enough to read much,
so I put a TV in her room. She could watch info-mercials for hours :) but if I found an old movie (from her era) it was comforting to her. Took away some of the irritability.

She also liked looking at old family picture albums.

Thank you so much . Will go through the mentioned points and review them and lets see how we can take this ahead
Thanks Mohan

Eventually the patient becomes incontinent, both ways. My loved one has been in pull ups for about a year. Is your FIL? That would seem to help with his urination issue.

With advanced dementia, it's rather difficult to create activities that the patient can engage in, since their focus is extremely limited. You can try various things and see, but my loved one, who has advanced dementia, seems to only be amused by simple jewelry. She likes necklaces of colorful beads and bracelets. She looks at the them and that's about it. Sometimes she looks at pictures of cats that are at her eye level, but sometimes she will tear them down and rip them to pieces. She doesn't realize she's doing it.

In Memory Care units, they have the residents move their feet and arms about, and they have some play BINGO, though that skill is not likely to last for long.

I have heard of providing them a bowl of buttons and ask them to find the red button in a bowl of other colors. If they are able to stay focused, this can amuse them for long periods, though they may need reminding of what they are looking for. This activity must be supervised, since they could ingest the buttons.

There are devices available on line that are designed for dementia patients. It's like a board with buttons to button, zippers to zip, velco to fasten, etc. It gives them things to do with their hands.

If your FIL is too advanced to do these activities, then you might consider playing his favorite music, gentle massage and pleasant fragrances. Perhaps reading to him from something he used to enjoy, such as sports hero stories or looking at photo albums of family members. Is he able to go outside and enjoy trees, fresh air?

If he is highly agitated, I would work with his doctor and/or a geriactric psychiatrist do find a medication to help him. My loved one is very distraught and fearful without medication, but Cymbalta worked miracles for her and now she is very content. I would strongly encourage you to explore his options. When he's not so agitated, he might be able to focus on activities more.

I have had to adjust to the fact that my loved one is becoming less amused in any activity. Some residents seem to stare and do not respond to anything. Maybe others here can help give you advice about that situation.

If he is in a Memory Care facility, they should be helping you with this.