Why doesn't our stepmom want us to help her take Dad to his doctor appt.?

Or perhaps one of your brothers moved the cash to a safe place? Keeping that amount in the house is plain daft at the best of times, let alone when its owner has dementia. Come *on.*

There's really no need to put a sinister construction on her not wanting you to go the appointment, you know. Put yourself in his or her shoes - would you want either of them coming with you to see your doctor?

Everybody was fine with Dad keeping $42,000 in cash in his house, and counting it once in a while? You know that cash is not insured, if the house burns down? And you know that people with dementia hide things and forget where they hid them all the time? And you are only now getting concerned about the money when it is apparently missing? What's wrong with this picture?

Janet and Dad have been married 37 years. She is his POA. She doesn't need to involve you in any of her decisions. Perhaps she got worried and moved the cash to a sensible place, like a bank. Perhaps she used it to secure a care center placement. Or maybe it is just plain lost.

It is (probably) kind of you to offer to go with Dad to a doctor's appointment. But there is nothing suspicious about her wanting to go with him alone.

Crying and making noises can be symptoms of his dementia. She lives with him. Don't you think she notices his dementia? You apparently think that it would be best to place Dad in some kind of care center now. You all agree. But you know what? It is not your decision. It is Janet's decision. Certainly explain why you think placement would be best now. But then back off. IT IS NOT YOUR DECISION.

Thanks I wasn't sure I was going to get such a fast answer cool. Janet has poa.They have been married 37 yrs. I Had checked his money 2 weeks ago it was there. the moneys been in the same place, only people in the house has been family I have been asking about the money joking ways to see these people have any type of discomforting signs or defense remarks . Janet says I really don't care about the money , so don't ever ask me again ok?

Who has Dad's powers of attorney? He has the right to spend his money as he wants. If stepmom has the POA's she doesn't have to tell anybody anything. Have they been married long? Missing money? When was the last time you know it was there? Anybody that has been in the house may have found it.