These posts clarified for me what hospice nurses told me in 2009 when my 84 year old husband was admitted to an inpatient hospice house. They said, "We have given him a cocktail of morphine and something else to help him sleep." He died peacefully 15 hours later. After reading on this site a reference to ". . . what many believe is the deadly cocktail of morphine and Ativan . . .," I believe I understood correctly what those nurses implied. Peace for all concerned.
It's funny that they were deleted. That is just what someone gets making an ignorant comment during this heartbreaking time. My grandmothers showing was just tonight. I only made this post to help others not to be graded on spelling. What do you need explanation on sendme2help? Do you have a question for me?
Ok then. Once the offending, cursing posts were deleted, there is my post addressing issues, standing out like a sore thumb, without an explanation. Again.
This topic is so emotionally charged for almost anyone, wouldn't it be great just to ignore the painful ecperiences and have a spelling bee competition instead?
Kathy, so sorry for your sadness. Thanks for sharing this story. Many of us will be facing this with our loved ones soon. It's good to learn from the ecperinces of others.
No problem. My hope was to help anyone who was in a similar situation and had questions. It's really all about the person and their wishes. As for my grandma, she was ready to go. So we let her.
Thank you for sharing, Kathy. Yes, your mother made the right decision for her mother. My mom, 95 now, was on hospice several months last year. She improved and "graduated" from the program. If it is not a person's time to go, being on hospice doesn't make it happen. If it is time, hospice makes the experience less stressful.
I started to question if what we did was right. A little over a week in Hospice care,my grandmother has passed. She did not last a week on the morphine/Ativan cocktail. My grandmother was 95 years old. She had lived a long and healthy life up until the last six months of it. She battled UTI for most of the summer and it took a lot out of her. She had multiple trips to the ER then Doctor follow ups. She eventually just didn't feel right. She was diagnosed with congestive heart failure 2 weeks before she died. After coming home from the hospital, she swore she'd never go back. She was staying in bed more and eating very little. My mother, her daughter and full time care giver called hospice. They brought a hospital bed and introduced a team of care givers. Three days after staying in bed full time... Because she had said, she would not get back out of it. She began having horrible pain and a lot of anxiety. That's where the morphine and Ativan came in. The first day she was very happy and pain free. Still not eating or drinking. Confusion started to set in. Then the terminal restlessness. I've never felt so helpless until my grandmother and my rock looked at me and said, "I'm scared!" She also said things like. I know I have to get somewhere, but they haven't told me where to go. Finally she was no longer able to speak but was in no pain and was not scared. My mother held her hand as she took her last breath. She had the opportunity to die at home with her family pain free. That is how I know we made the right decision. The medicine didn't kill her. She no longer had the will to live and she was ready. The medication aloud her do it pain free. Once she was relaxed, out of pain she was able to let go. Even though it hurts and I will never go through one day that I do not miss her. I feel we made the right decision for her. We showed her the love and care she had at one time showed all of us. Thank you Gentiva Hospice for taking care of my Grandma. 💔
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My grandmother was 95 years old. She had lived a long and healthy life up until the last six months of it. She battled UTI for most of the summer and it took a lot out of her. She had multiple trips to the ER then Doctor follow ups.
She eventually just didn't feel right. She was diagnosed with congestive heart failure 2 weeks before she died.
After coming home from the hospital, she swore she'd never go back. She was staying in bed more and eating very little.
My mother, her daughter and full time care giver called hospice. They brought a hospital bed and introduced a team of care givers. Three days after staying in bed full time... Because she had said, she would not get back out of it. She began having horrible pain and a lot of anxiety. That's where the morphine and Ativan came in.
The first day she was very happy and pain free. Still not eating or drinking. Confusion started to set in. Then the terminal restlessness. I've never felt so helpless until my grandmother and my rock looked at me and said, "I'm scared!" She also said things like. I know I have to get somewhere, but they haven't told me where to go. Finally she was no longer able to speak but was in no pain and was not scared. My mother held her hand as she took her last breath.
She had the opportunity to die at home with her family pain free.
That is how I know we made the right decision. The medicine didn't kill her. She no longer had the will to live and she was ready. The medication aloud her do it pain free.
Once she was relaxed, out of pain she was able to let go.
Even though it hurts and I will never go through one day that I do not miss her. I feel we made the right decision for her. We showed her the love and care she had at one time showed all of us.
Thank you Gentiva Hospice for taking care of my Grandma. 💔