I am an umarried, alone 56 yr old who now lives with her. I have taken her to the doctor once. She did the test with drawing the clock. Determined there is something starting. But she is very proud and i can not get her to see anyone else. She has gotten totally against me. She doesn't trust me heck she doesn't even like me anymore. She asks the same questions many many times. She loses her bank cards in her purse and blames me for taking them and her money. Usually its lost at the Casino and she doesn't remember that.That's the only dam place i can take her that makes her happy and i am so trapped. It's just me and i have no one to talk to. Even if I did she would bother me who i am taking to even get on the phone and listen. Sometimes she will hide the car keys.It's her car but i pay for everything else insurance, repairs, gas etc. Often i can;t even go grocery shopping without her giving me grief. I leave my cell phone on in case she needs me and all she does is call an gets mad at me EVERY TIME!
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Sometimes as family members and caretakers, we have to make things happen, like getting them to the doctor and protecting them. It's unlikely that she will change her ways and start cooperating and doing the things like you would prefer. It's the nature of dementia.
Her behavior is likely to get worse as she progresses. Many patients are difficult, resistant, and are not able to protect their own interests any longer. I would find some support to help me. Sometimes finding a way that others can deal with the patient is helpful. Not everyone is cut out to handle a person with dementia. It often takes teams of people to do it. I wouldn't feel bad. Finding your mom the care she needs is the best thing to do. Plus, you have to look out for yourself. The more you learn about her condition, the more empowered you will become as well.
It sounds like the role of caretakef of your mom, who sounds like she is a hand full, might be something that you don't feel comfortable doing. I might try to recruit some other family members or close friends to come up with a plan. If your mom is resistant, they are legal ways to address that.
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