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Alexander4 Asked May 2016

Should I let my husband with dementia go ahead with his plans to organize an ALZ Walk?

The last two years, since he was diagnosed, we have walked for the cure. We formed a team, I worked my fanny off organizing bake sales, rummage sales, keeping track of donations, etc. from other sources. After last year, it became too much for me to think about doing, with all the day to day stuff I have to deal with now that he has declined almost half from what he was last year.

We had the discussion, and I told him I couldn't handle it this year. Yesterday he was looking at the calendar, trying to find October (which I had to find for him) He said he is going to do a walk just like last year. If I didn't want to do it, then he would do it himself. I realize he has no memory of our previous discussions, and may not remember what he said yesterday.

Of course, even tho he thinks he is, he is not capable of thinking of two things at once, let alone doing this. He loves the attention he got from doing the walk and raising funds etc. He doesn't comprehend that others did the work.

Do I cave in and try to do it again, even tho I am already exhausted, or let him go ahead and find out it is not possible?

jeannegibbs May 2016
I love FF's idea. The walk will go on this year. Someone is organizing it. That someone should be very attuned to the needs of persons with dementia. Discuss how your husband can be honored -- perhaps along with other persons with dementia who walk that day.

Dear hubby has dementia. He doesn't know what would be involved. You don't have dementia, but you have experience so you do know what is involved! You need to make the decision!

pamzimmrrt May 2016
I think this is too cool,, but I agree with FF, It;s a good idea and he;d be so pleased to be a "big wig",, and you could just walk and kind of enjoy!

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Alexander4 May 2016
cwillie ~ To me it is not necessary. We could just put on our tee shirts and do the walk.

cwillie May 2016
Usually these kind of events welcome everyone to come out and participate, is it really necessary to fund raise and put together a team?

freqflyer May 2016
Are there other people who could do the organizing and make your hubby an "honorary chairman" or "grand marshal" of the race? Tell him it is now someone else's turn and they would be honored if he gave them his expert advice.

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