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helpfulone Asked July 2016

Daughter overstepping her boundaries?

Hubby has been in rehab for 2 weeks. He is progressing really well, behind my back his daughter who flew in town this weekend , to reschedule his care plan meeting she, rescheduled it. It was changed. I just happened to see the paper and she skirted around the meeting change. She will be in town in 8 days again. Do i change it to this week when she is not here.......I wouldnt have minded the change if she had been up front. about it....just dont get the power struggle. I feel she is overstepping her boundaries. hubby was ok changing it but they failed to tell him i didnt know about it. I will be getting a elder law atty Monday.all she really wants is control of the bank account.


 

igloo572 Jul 2016
A care plan meeting can be done via a conference call. I did several this way for my mom as I live in another state. To make nice, I'd ask to reschedule yet another CPM at whatever date the facility has available abd those that can be here in erson are and those that can't are there via CC. The date is placed based on facility next opening so gets it off you for the date change.

Good move on seeing your own atty & ASAP. Hubs may need to do some new paperwork placing you as main point person for his care.

Be there early & often to get him to be positive in his rehab. All this will be noted in his charts btw. Try to make it a point to chat with the therapist in rehab and his nursing staff.

For my moms CPM I always brought some sort of food item.....big bow of grapes or mini apples or mini baked goods. The CPM is maybe 15 minutes but somehow if there's food you get more time. At the end of the CPM - for me - I was asked to sign off on what the plan is. You can write in your concerns in the space where yiu signature or even bring in a written statement of your concerns and you write in "please refer to attached letter by XYZ as wife /dpoa for John Z." which they have to place into his chart. Conversation is good but just doesn't carry the weight & accountability of something written and in thier chart. Comprende?

Good luck in all this. I'm sure there is quite the backstory on his daughter...

GardenArtist Jul 2016
Add that his daughter isn't a permanent resident in your area and is only available now b/c she flew in for a visit. You're the constant factor in the relationship; she's not.

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BarbBrooklyn Jul 2016
Eldercare attorny is a good idea. I would also talk to the social worker or whoever schedules the care meetings at the facility. Politely tell them that you need to be notified of any changes as communication with your stepdaughter is "imperfect".

freqflyer Jul 2016
That does seem strange, as rehab centers and social workers only work with whomever is on the HIPAA signed paperwork. Unless your husband had added his daughter's name to the list. But then again, everyone who is on that list would be notified of a meeting.

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