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Afraid13 Asked July 2016

Am I doing the right thing?

My mom passed away in November and it was unexpected. Previous to this i had temporary custody of my 13 year old sister, and when my mom passed away i went through the courts to get all rights for her. I guess my question is i had previously wanted to move to a farther location 2 hours from where we live now. I have a brother and sister that live in my general location that would get really upset if we moved and her step father lives 1hr away from us, i guess im asking am i doing the right thing with taking her with me or should i give up my rights to the stepdad and let her live down there with them. Im so confused to what to do she goes to church with them but i feel that if she stays with them she wont accomplish anything inn her life. Thank you

Sunnygirl1 Jul 2016
It sounds like you have valid reasons for the move. I'm not sure that a girl her age can appreciate the concerns. She may focus on staying due to knowing people, familiar places, etc. But, it's very important to have good schools, extracurricular activities, job opportunities, cultural events, higher incomes, and access to resources. Growing up with those thing is a great opportunity. Whereas staying in a depressed community can limit you. I have seen that happen with some of my family. If you don't get out of the town, you are stuck with few options. A lot of kids end up in trouble due to financial crisis and/or boredom.

There is a lot to consider, but I would really think about what your sister might gain. If she wants to move back when she's 18, that would be up to her.

BarbBrooklyn Jul 2016
It sounds like you want to move for all the right reasons! Two hoours is certainly not the ends of the earth, and she can kep in touch via email and social media, right?

How does she feel about this?

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Afraid13 Jul 2016
Its her stepdad and i have full custody of her. The move is 2 hours away from where i currently live. The reason for moving is this small town we live in has nothing to offer me or my children. I want them to have better choices in life. But i also feel guilty for dragging her in a move like this

BarbBrooklyn Jul 2016
Is the other parent that you refer to HER stepdad or YOUR stepdad? If he's her biological parent, is he going to fight you for custody? How far away are you contemplating moving, and why? And finally, how does she feel about a majot move?

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