My mom is refusing to go to assisted living?

Chf, I'm told, can sometimes lead to vascular dementia. She might appear " sharp as a tack" in some situations, but it sounds like she's lost her reasoning ability.

Next time she falls you need to call 911 no matter what. Once she is in the hospital you need to tell staff that your home is 'unsafe' for her to stay and and that you need to get her in a place where she is cared for properly. If you think she will go willingly you are kidding yourself. Caring for her will damage your health. There is nothing wrong with realizing this is more than you can do.

Thanks Babalou, that is what I wanted to do and she insisted on not calling 911. I should have listened to my better judgement and dialed anyway. I am not sure how long before she does fall and hurt herself which could be irreparable. Last time we went through this she fell 3 times before going to hospital and rehab. Hopefully I can help her understand the danger of staying with me though will be tough. She is critical of everything I say or do except my cooking lol. Hopefully its not too late.to make her see she needs a safer environment that I can not provide for her.

I hope that the next time she falls, you not only call for help; you call 911 and insist that they take her to the ER to be checked out. You then have access to the hospital social worker to work on a plan about where she needs to live.

She has CHF and the doctors all recommend exercise/activity which she refuses to do. She tells them she does but they know not true because she is getting weaker by the day. Says she doesnt need to listen to anyone because only she knows her body. I am not POA, she lives in my house and I just want her to be the best she can be. She is so stubborn that its killing her. She says she does not want to go anywhere else, other homes are depressing, yet she is not doing well with me. She fights with me and criticizes me for everything but my cooking. She uses a walker but she fell again last night and I had to call for help because I can not get her up on my own, she is too weak to help herself up as well. She used to say she didnt want to be a burden although watching her this way is just that.

Has she been diagnosed with any particular ailment? Does she have a history of depression? Is she disabled due to some physical condition? I think I might explore what is going on with her doctor, if she will allow you to go with her. If you know her condition, perhaps the doctor can be of assistance in making a recommendation for some type of facility.

Are you her Durable Power of Attorney? Is she still competent?

Is the house yours or hers?

What type of agencies have offered her help? Many people beg to get help from agencies.