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Stlatracy Asked August 2016

Will a nursing homes take my mom?

My mother has had dementia for several years.  I do not know the exact time nor do I know the "stage" she is in now. Fast forward to the last few weeks. She was on two antidepressants, BuSpar and Setraline. Doctor stopped them, no titration, added Depakote. Within one week she was experiencing a significant worsening of her symptoms. She began to be very agitated, angry, throwing things, trying to leave the house, calling me names (living with my husband and myself.) As the week progressed she was not making sense when she spoke, incomplete sentences, very moody within minutes was angry and mad then happy and content. She was refusing to eat and take her meds. I called PCP who told me to bring her to ER. So, head to ER, while she was in backseat pulling my hair and trying to get out of the car. Then spent 25 hours in ER exam room with her while the staff was trying to find a behavioral center that would "take her." Court order was signed by judge in the middle of the night and mom transported to a behavioral health center 11 days ago. Medication was changed to Seroquel on day 4 of admission. No real change to date. Yesterday she had an "episode" at the center where in the main TV area of the floor proceeded to start yelling and then squatted and pooped her pants, then reached her hand in her panties and tried to throw feces at the staff!!! Horrifying!! Met with social worker and spoke with doctor today; stopping Seroquel and starting Risperdal. They (the behavioral center) wanted to start discharge planning, so yesterday, before this episode, I had toured a few nursing homes. Now it will be another week to assess the effect of this new medication. I have not slept well or eaten much over the last 11 days. Anyone else experience anything like this? Will nursing homes take her?? I have tried a thousand times in my mind to figure out how I can take her back home, but I just don't see it. It was very hard before this, and now I do not think it will ever be to that level again. I am heartbroken.

Stlatracy Aug 2016
Thank you all for your responses. Thanklessjob ~ stopped the BuSpar and Setraline and started Depakote to try and help her mood swings. That is what I was told. Bipolar diagnosed within last month. Not by psychiatrt or neurology, but by PCP.... ? Criteria.

zythrr Aug 2016
Good luck finding a NH that would take her. Behavioral center will note her "episode"in her file which a potential NH would see. You may not have any other choice but to take her home.

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staceyb Aug 2016
Thanklessjob, great info!

SueC1957 Aug 2016
Stlatracy,
You can check Alz sites for a list of the Stages of Alzheimer's. I have also posted it on this forum but I'm not sure under which thread. It "sounds" like she may be in Stage 5-6 but I'm just guessing.

The following information is taken from Drugs.com.
BuSpar is an anti-anxiety medicine that is used to treat symptoms of anxiety, such as fear, tension, irritability, dizziness, pounding heartbeat, and other physical symptoms. There is currently no evidence for withdrawal, dependence or rebound anxiety after discontinuation.

Sertraline is an antidepressant in a group of drugs called selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs). Sertraline affects chemicals in the brain that may be unbalanced in people with depression, panic, anxiety, or obsessive-compulsive symptoms.

Depakote is used to treat various types of seizure disorders, also used to treat manic episodes related to bipolar disorder (manic depression), and to prevent migraine headaches. Side effects can include confusion, crying, dementia, delusions, dysphoria, depression, rapidly changing moods, anxiety and loss of appetite.

Seroquel is an antipsychotic medicine. It works by changing the actions of chemicals in the brain and is used to treat schizophrenia. Seroquel is NOT approved for use in psychotic conditions related to dementia and may increase the risk of death in older adults with dementia-related conditions. It's also used to treat bipolar disorder (manic depression). Seroquel is also used together with antidepressant medications to treat major depressive disorder in adults.


Risperdal is an antipsychotic medication used to treat schizophrenia and symptoms of bipolar disorder (manic depression). Risperdal is also used in autistic children to treat symptoms of irritability. Important information; Risperdal is NOT approved for use in psychotic conditions related to dementia and may increase the risk of death in older adults with dementia-related conditions.

With that said, why did the doctor take your mom off the Buspar and Setraline if they seemed to be working? Was she diagnosed with schizophrenia or manic depression (bipolar) recently? Obviously the change threw her for a loop. I would get a geriatric neurologist to evaluate her right away. The doctor can straighten out her goofed up meds.

I would not recommend taking your mother home with you. You said that it was very hard BEFORE this. It's practically impossible to deal with a mentally ill person, who also suffers with dementia. My mother went through something similar, urinating in the clothes hamper or garbage can in her room when she moved to the memory care facility. She also physically attacked me. There was no change in her medications. The staff had to remove both from her room so she'd get the idea to go urinate in the bathroom right next to her room. It took a month but she finally started using the toilet.

I'm so sorry that this is happening. Try to take care of yourself and not dwell on her situation or you'll wind up sick. And, please, have her seen by a geriatric neurologist soon. They would be qualified to prescribe the appropriate meds for your mom.

jeannegibbs Aug 2016
Of course you are heartbroken. What a disastrous turn of events. My heart goes out to you and your entire family.

Of course you cannot bring mother home. At least not now, and perhaps never. This is also extremely sad. Go ahead and let yourself mourn for this loss.

I can't imagine the typical nursing home being able to deal with this level of need. But if the behavioral health center can find a good combination of drugs to calm her without turning her into a zombie, that may change things considerably.

Please keep us informed. We care!

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