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jenlaur Asked August 2016

My mother needs to leave her rest home but the home is giving her a hard time?

Back in February we moved my mother from a rehab facility to a rest home. We both looked at the facility and thought it would be fine for the time being. Back in February she was much stronger having finished PT and OT at the rehab. Since then, she's fallen multiple times (she has Parkinson's). There isn't much room to move around in the room she's in. When she first moved in we were told by the owner that she would be moved to a two bed room but that never happened..and others have moved in since then, too. This rest home does not have any ramps or a smooth driveway. It's a much older home..100+ years old I think. Renovated to suit at a rest home. My mother's last fall was back on July 29th..she fell backwards after getting up from her chair in the dining room, hitting her back on a buffet cabinet behind her and landing on her already sore arm (sore after many, many falls and trying to break her fall with it just about ever time). So, now because she's not eligible to be in a nursing home, we'd like to move her to another rest home. This one has larger rooms with only two beds to a room, many bathrooms (the one she's in only has two bathrooms for the floor) she doesn't have her own phone (we had to get her a cell phone which is very difficult for her to figure out ..the only phone is a 'residents phone' in the dining room). We submitted her application for the other rest home the other day. When I brought her back to her current home and after I left, the administrator and the owner cornered her and after peppering her with lots of questions and trying real hard to discourage her from leaving, they tell her that she signed a paper saying she needs to give them a 30 day notice. The other rest home cannot hold a bed for 30+ days for my mom, even if she gave them a deposit. Can we just take my mother out of there and say 'screw you' to them? Do they have any legal leg to stand on, knowing full well that she doesn't have any assets to sue her for? She's real upset over this. I'm saying..we'll just leave and what are they going to do? Sue? lol for what? She doesn't have any money. What money she gets goes to the rest home minus a very small stipend left over ($73/mo to be exact)

jenlaur Aug 2016
rest home is what I'm talking about, not nursing home. She's not qualified for nursing home yet because she's still able to dress herself and go to the bathroom by herself (even though she's a fall risk) and it takes her a long time to do anything, really.

MsMadge Aug 2016
Your mother's safety is most important so move her if they have space but make sure you have the Medicaid payment in place to the new facility

I have to ask how are you using the words rest home and nursing home differently? Most nursing facilities have two beds for Medicare patients and three beds per room for Medicaid patients - I have only seen a private room in rare cases and the family seems to private pay for it

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jenlaur Aug 2016
I called the lady at the new place and she says that they (any rest home or nursing home) can't enforce the 30 day notice because there's no way any facility will be able to hold a bed (unless it's private pay). My Mom has medicad and Mass Health and they won't hold to that. So, after talking with my Mom, who's very worried that this home she's in now, will come after my husband and I for financial responsibility or whatever you call it. Told her they can try, but I doubt it'll uphold in court, etc. So, we're moving her over to the new rest home on Thursday this coming week. Yay! I like that place so much better. :)

GardenArtist Aug 2016
I can understand the 30 day notice issue, but I think your mother's welfare is the priority, and from what you describe, I would be depressed in that room. Go ahead and move her, and create a special type of celebration for her.

jenlaur Aug 2016
She's in a long, narrow room with two other women. For some reason, those beds are queen size and hers is twin or double..I think twin. There's a bed side table but it isn't hers, it is for the woman next to her. There's a bereau for her use that has a small flat screen tv on it, we brought her a small three shelf unit and she has a hard back chair and a couple of totes behind it..that's her private space. plenty of light..the room has 4 windows but very little room for her to maneuver with her walker. I'm going to talk to the other rest home's administrator tomorrow and find out how long they'll hold the bed for her with a deposit. I don't know that she'll ever be really happy in wherever she ends up..this new rest home or eventually a nursing home; having been a very independent woman before her illness did this to her body. However, I don't want to have to worry about her all the time. I have so much on my plate already..so I am thinking, we're taking her out regardless of that stupid 30 day notice thing. I get why it's in place, but I can't see how any judge would want to hear this considering.... thank you all for your feedback. I really appreciate it. :)

Rainmom Aug 2016
Most everywhere require a 30 day notice. Not giving notice you will likely loose any deposits you put down. Still, if the new place is better for her you should grab it as the best places fill quickly. It would be wise to talk to whomever is your contact with Medicaid and make sure they understand your situation.

pamzimmrrt Aug 2016
OMG,, "only 2 beds to a room" at the new place? How many beds are in a room at her current place? Sounds funny to me? I think you have grounds to complain.. and move her soon! Good luck

GardenArtist Aug 2016
You can play dirty and raise all of the complaints you have, including the lack of ramps, smooth driveway, phones in each of the rooms, etc. You might want to check with the local or state ombudsperson before raising this issue as there may be more issues of compliance with this place.

I assume this place is licensed, if it's required to be in your state?

pamstegma Aug 2016
As soon as the other home is available, move her immediately. Yes you will have a penalty for less than 30 days notice, but if they fill the room with a new tenant, the rent should be refunded. Work closely with the Medicaid caseworker, be sure they understand your reason for the move.

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