My father is not trying to help himself. What should we do?

My father (85) has had three strokes. He is able to eat, use the restroom, dress himself etc. He lives with my husband and me. I have noticed lately that he is not motivated to do any exercises, go outside, or go to functions. He would sit in front of the couch all day and watch tv if we let him. He now has my husband pulling down his bed covers and now covering him up. We bring him his food and place a tray in front of him. Then he will tell us to get him a napkin or take the tray away when he is done. I think he should get his own forks and spoons and napkin as he is perfectly capable to do this. He should pull his own covers down and cover himself up. We should make him go outside and go with us places instead of him dictating our lives. I told my husband we should not ask him if he want to go but tell him he is going . He is becoming a hermit. He also had the use of his left hand after his strokes but refuses to put the work in to get the use of it back. His arm and hand muscles now have atrophed to the point that his fingers are biting into the palm of his hand and that makes me very angry. What should we do ?