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FindingRainbows Asked September 2016

Would the best decision be to contact an elder lawyer for POA forms?

My Mother is in the moderate stage of dementia.  She has no short term memory at all and long term is not that sharp either.  We only completed and had notorized a Durable POA year's ago before her disease escalated, and, she could still make decisions, but, did not have the other forms done, like medical directives, etc. She lives with my husband and I, and we are her sole caregivers. She has no assets, no insurance, no property aside from personal property (clothes, jewerly etc). All she receives is a monthly social security check. At this point of her disease, would the best decision be to contact an Elder Lawyer for the rest of the forms? If she's incompetent to make decisions now, how would we proceed?

GardenArtist Sep 2016
Rainbows, setting aside the memory issues, does she still have cognitive ability? Could she understand that she would be establishing terms for "catastrophic" and terminal options?

I would consult with an elder law attorney, just so you know what all your options are and know that you've addressed them. This would be especially important if there are any accounts which aren't held jointly with her.

If you haven't already, inventory her assets as well as the joint or single designations, and discuss with an attorney what happens to those accounts after her death.

Susieshoes Sep 2016
You could still contact an elder care attorney for advice on what you can do in terms of POA and living will, etc.. We did this when it became clear Dad's dementia had gotten worse. She drafted new documents and we brought him in to sign them. As she explained, Dad is her client and the documents are to ensure the best care possible for him. He too is staying in our homes until it becomes necessary to move him into a facility, should that ever happen. Her advice was invaluable, eased lots of our worst assumptions and fears, and has been money well-spent... for Dad, also!

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FindingRainbows Sep 2016
Thank you for your reply Windyridge. My Mom has very good insurance, Medicaid, Medicare, also Aging Waiver benefits which has been a godsend. I guess there's one pro in being destitute, is that she has the Cadillac of all insurances. She'll remain under our care until she can no longer function at home or, becomes a danger to herself or others around her. Putting her into a full time care facility is something I want to avoid for as long as we and she is able too.

Windyridge Sep 2016
With moderate dementia she is not competent to sign any directives. Read your POA closely and/ or have an attorney review it with you. You may have more ability to act on her behalf that you realize.

Where is this going for you guys? Medicaid? Care facility?

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