The cost of care even for the VA facility is 90% of his total income for all sources.

There are two types of VA long-term care facilities. State VA Nursing Homes and VA "Community Living Centers".

Admittance to Community Living Centers is usually reserved for those with service connected disabilities of between 60% and 70%. A co-pay may be required if the veteran's income is above a specified limit.

State Veteran Nursing Homes will generally accept veterans with non-service connected disabilities and will expect the veteran to pay all of their income to the facility with no dispensation for a spouse living at home.

It is for this reason that Medicaid is the preferable solution if there is a spouse who does not have adequate income of their own as Medicaid does provide relief for spouses of Medicaid recipients.

Did you fill out the community spouse allowance calculation? Sit down with the financial aid person and present your needs.

MsPatS, then you have him apply for Medicaid. Medicaid will give you a CSA= community spouse allowance. There ARE tax breaks on property tax for disabled veterans AND your tax preparer will establish a large deduction on your federal tax return on Schedule A. PLEASE see and elder law attorney.

That was not mentioned, although I did express my concern saying "how is the spouse supposed to pay the bills without going broke' There was no response to that question. I realize it Is expensive everywhere and will try to keep him home as long as possible. Very scary times. Thanks for the info, I will check that out.

Contact your VA disability rep as soon as possible to file for Aid & Attendance to help with your living expenses. Do it ASAP because the process is a long one.

I have been trying to get Aid & Attendance since 2011, have been my husbands caregiver over 20yrs, I am 81, my husband 86. He was a career man and is 100% disabled. I have a large file of avenues sort for help, it seems that since I am his spouse and still on two feet no help is available. He falls under the Vietnam era and should still considered under the WWII Vets Aid & Attendance. I hope you have better luck than me. Silver threads.

MsPatS-I hear you sister! Both my husband and I are 57. He has Alzheimer's. I wonder this all the time. Yes, I got my assets protected, but I'm not sure that I will be able stay in my home without his pension and SS. Which of course he will need for his care. Basically we are f&*ked. After over a year of asking this question I finally got and answer from my doctor and the Alzheimer's association. Yes, people are selling their homes and moving to lower costing states, or out of the country all together. Not sure why the life of a person with dementia is more valuable than a working, contributing member of society, but evidently it is here in America. We are under 65, so there is really no help. Most assistance out there is for seniors. If you are over 65 you might have a better chance. I hope you find some help.

To the people at the age of 57, if one of you has Alzheimer's you should call up Hospice and be evaluated. They will provide help. Even though you are not yet on Medicare, you are considered disabled and can speak to a lawyer about disability. SSI. I don't know much about this, but would suggest you seek an attorney's help or legal aide for your state, maybe see if AARP can help you.

You do not need an attorney to get Social Security disability. All you need is a form filled out by your doctor stating you have a "terminal" illness and/or another disabling illness and can no longer work. Those persons under 65 are eligible. Talk to social security. I got it at 53 yrs.

I know couples where the husband is in long term nursing with Medicaid. These women did not lose their homes. You need to talk to Social Services to see what ur husband is entitled to. Just a question, aren't VA homes free of charge for a vet?