How to get my independent mother to meet people, participate in activities, crafts or even teach others to crochet?

Julie back off. Mom has just had major surgery on top of the loss of her husband.
She is tired poor lady. Everything exhaust her at the moment. Just getting dressed, taking a shower or getting a snack just make her want to sit down and take a nap.
As long as she is progressing with simple stuff like walking to the mailbox or taking short walk when you and your sister visit. Just be there for her she is unable to make anymore effort than that and her recovery can take up to a year or longer. The older we get the longer it takes to recover from such an assault on the body. If she is willing to go with you to the grocery store that is fine but push her round in a wheelchair or let her use an electric cart and make that it for the day.
The things that have been suggested are excellent but not now maybe in a year and only then if she wants to. I'd run screaming if someone took me to a senior center.
After Christmas i am going to spend two weeks with my daughter just outside of DC but i will just sit home and relax not hanker after a drive may the White house so I can drop in on the Trumps and welcome them to their new home.
I love going to resale shops but half an hour is enough and going out to dinner is no longer a treat. projects are still too difficult to complete so they are off the list at present. I had big plans to make a lot of gifts for this Christmas but guess what? A couple of days ago I sat down and ordered everything off the Internet.
Mom will appreciate short visits from friends and family and keeping up with people by email if she does that but a lot of activity and noise is just too much at present, especially as the loss of her husband is still very fresh and she feels isolated. but it will get better and as you see an improvement encourage her to do all the activities she previously enjoyed and make it easy for her to participate. Come back in a year and she will be a totally different woman.

If she's able to get out and about, she might be interested in some of the groups that do charity quilting and crocheting. Some of their creations are for preemies; some are sent overseas to men and women serving in country.

That would be a "craft" project as well as a conversational one, as I suspect there's a lot of getting acquainted and chatting as the quilting is done.

Many of those quilts are patchwork or pieced quilts. I don't know if they're done separately by pieces (i.e., one person pieces the smaller sections and someone else sews together the panels and larger sections), but there might be a way she could fit in her talents with the needs.

I believe the knitting and crochet groups are the ones that focus on little baby hats, perhaps booties also.

As she recovers, you could also check out local yarn stores. They often hold classes, and if she's really good, it could work into a teaching position, or maybe she could get enjoyment out of being a mentor in the class. I know that I would Love to be taught by someone who has that sort of skill! Here's to hoping she has a swift and full recovery! Take care!

I love that you're thinking in this direction! Check into local senior centers for classes, knitting circles etc. Give you mom some time - as others have mentioned, recovery from such a major surgery can be difficult both mentally and physically. And of course, recovery from loosing a spouse may never be complete. But for the independent type, helping and teaching others is often a great motivator. You've got great ideas - don't get discouraged.

SS makes a good point about Silver Sneakers, as do others about getting exercise. Some Senior Centers have seated PT, some have Senior Tai Chi (helpful for balance if the individual can stand through the exercises).

There are also the therapeutic dance sessions for people primarily with Parkinson's, but as I understand are open to others. This began with a one class trial experiment but has spread throughout the world.

Although I don't know for sure, I'm thinking that it's also a good way to get acquainted with others in post dance sessions chats.

I might just give her some time to regain her strength.

After my dad's quadruple bypass, he was not himself for months. He was depressed, quiet and didn't have interest in his old activities, but as time went by, he grew stronger. Part of that was helped by Silver Sneakers. Part of his recovery was attending an exercise program that was medically supervised with other seniors. He enjoyed it and excelled with his stamina. Within a year, he was back to his normal self. Perhaps, more emotional, but, still upbeat and active.

Daddy never was interested in the Senior Center, but he got a lot from church activities and he also would meet other seniors for coffee most weekdays.

Check with the local Senior Centers; they often have a variety of programs, including quilting and woodworking. If there's no crochet club, perhaps one could be started if sufficient interest exists. These are free clubs, basically some craft/art work in a casual social environment.

Some progressive hospitals have social clubs as well as therapy groups. I've found the ones that are the most progressive are those in high profile cities with excellent medical facilities that are also teaching hospitals.

The issue with the latter though would be getting in and out, as the hospitals are usually mammoth ones with sometimes extensive walks to get to the group rooms.

And BTW, this is just an online forum, with people participating from across the US, Canada, the UK and occasionally Australia and Asian countries. There are no activities hosted by the site other than the message board. For local activities, contact Senior Centers in your area, as I suggested above.

What does your mother like to do? What did she do before she lost her husband and had her surgery? As to fees, that would depend on which activities she chose. Has she taught you to crochet? That might be a pleasure to you both and allow her to see if she would enjoy teaching.
Since she has heart issues there are some hospitals who have programs for patients where they walk and study with a dietician. A therapist might be in order to help her recover. Medicare pays for therapy. If she gets walking and talking she will decide which activities she is interested in. If she is afraid or depressed she might need a little help. Take a walk with her daily if possible. An hour with a personal trainer might get her going. Did she have physical therapy after her surgery? She was probably given exercises to do. Try those with her. Exercise makes a person feel better and then she'll be able to decide what she would like to do to get going again. Many resist interference. Be sensitive and realize that some folks enjoy their lives without a lot of activities.

That's very thoughtful of you and your sister. Perhaps the thing to do would be to Google "day centres" or "activities for elders" in your mother's location and see what comes up?

Once you know what's available, you can work out the logistics, lifts to and fro, and so on. But very importantly, don't bully your mother into going if she doesn't want to. Encourage, yes, but let it be up to her.