My mom is 87 years old and has Alzhiemers. I dont know what phase she is in.
She is always feeling sick and sleeps alot. She often says "I wish the good lord would just take me" I am not sure how to respond when she gets in this mood. She is on medications for depression but they don't seem to be changing her depression?
The only thing she cares about is her dog,which she is constantly feeding. When I let her know that lulu the dog is overweight she gets upset.
9 Answers
Helpful Newest
First Oldest
First
ADVERTISEMENT
What is her infirmity? (COPD, cancer, dementia, etc?)
How old is she?
Have you considered having her evaluated and treated for depression?
If you think she might be in the end stage, perhaps a hospice evaluation would help confirm that or say it is not likely at this time.
A few more details about MIL would help us offer more specific comments.
My parents, who were in their 90's, use to brag that they only needed 6 hours of sleep at night.... but they forgot to add in the naps they took after breakfast... the nap after lunch.... again a nap before dinner and a realllllly long nap after dinner.
But he also had sleep problems throughout his disease (Lewy Body Dementia). He took one medication to help him sleep, and another medication to help him stay awake during the day. He had a reasonable quality of life -- he felt his life was worth getting up for.
I guess what I am saying is that excessive sleeping MIGHT be a sign that the end is near. If that is the case there will be other signs. If the body is taking its natural course in this way, there is probably not a lot to do about it, except make the most of the awake periods.
But dementia often causes sleep issues throughout its progression. Then it is worth trying to bring the sleep/awake ratio into a more "normal" pattern. My husband's sleep problems were present in the first month. He lived 10 years with the disease.
Depression is also a cause of sleep disturbance. If the medication your mother is taking isn't working for that, talk to the doctor who prescribed it. Maybe a different dose or a different drug would work better. Even if she is on the last leg of this journey it would be good if she could face it without depression.
She wishes the good lord would take her? "I can see why you feel that way. The disease you have is horrible. But we know that good lord will take you when it is your time to die. That will be joyous to be in heaven, won't it? Until then, let's try to make you comfortable here on earth. Is there something I could do right now to make you a tiny bit happier?" (Or a similar sentiment at a level she can understand. Mainly that she isn't a bad person for feeling that way and you'd like to help her feel a little better.)
I wonder if a hospice evaluation would be useful. They can probably tell if she is starting the end-of-life processes. If they say she isn't, then it might make more sense to encourage her to be awake more.
I've sure used a lot of words to say, "I don't know" haven't I? One thing I'm certain of: I wish comfort and peace for both you and your mother.