Debbie, I forget to mention, my own Dad went into Assisted Living/Memory Care on his own accord due to memory issues.
My Dad said it was the best move. He was around other people of his own generation, he had new guy friends as his table mates for all the meals, he enjoyed the activities [especially the music], and he said he felt like a King with all the attention he was getting :)
Debbie, I see from your profile that your Dad has Alzheimer's/Dementia. Has it progressed to a point where Dad needs a higher level of care?
If Dad is in Assisted Living/Memory Care, the facility must have deemed that Dad is in need of such care. Was your sister his full-time caregiver, or was he on his own? Sounds like maybe it had become too much for one person to take care of him and/or he was a safety risk to himself.
Had any of the other daughters been helping out with his care?
You cannot just up and decide to put someone away. You need a court order, or two MD's who agree that he needs a higher level of care. The facility will also evaluate the patient. It's not as easy as you think it is. I'm sorry you were not kept in the loop, but if you were not making the effort to keep in touch with dad, I can see where this caught you by surprise.
If you believe your dad does not want to live in assisted living and your sister has done this against his will. I would talk to your dad directly and talk to a social worker as well for help. Try to start a family meeting with everyone including your dad to sort out these decisions. Its never easy dealing with an aging parent, but these tough decisions must be discussed. I know dealing with sibling is tough, but you don't want their to be an estrangement due to finances or lack of communication. Do the best you can for your father to ensure he is safe and well taken care of.
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My Dad said it was the best move. He was around other people of his own generation, he had new guy friends as his table mates for all the meals, he enjoyed the activities [especially the music], and he said he felt like a King with all the attention he was getting :)
If that is "putting someone away", sign me up !!
Were you participating in his care prior to his entering an Assisted Living facility?
Is your father upset with his current living conditions?
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If Dad is in Assisted Living/Memory Care, the facility must have deemed that Dad is in need of such care. Was your sister his full-time caregiver, or was he on his own? Sounds like maybe it had become too much for one person to take care of him and/or he was a safety risk to himself.
Had any of the other daughters been helping out with his care?
If you believe your dad does not want to live in assisted living and your sister has done this against his will. I would talk to your dad directly and talk to a social worker as well for help. Try to start a family meeting with everyone including your dad to sort out these decisions. Its never easy dealing with an aging parent, but these tough decisions must be discussed. I know dealing with sibling is tough, but you don't want their to be an estrangement due to finances or lack of communication. Do the best you can for your father to ensure he is safe and well taken care of.
What exactly is your question?