You will need a care agreement. See an elder law attorney for help and help you to see all the angles. You will be an employee as defined by the IRS and Labor Department. So, dad in law will be an employer with responsibility to pay taxes, Medicare, disability, etc...
So, will you be working 24 hours a day or who will be working the other shifts? If you are working an 8 hour shift, I think $20.00 an hour, for general cleaning and laundry. It goes up, if you are giving him skilled care. Since you are quiting your job, please consider that you are no longer paying into your own retirement. That in itself will be costly. You didn't ask for this advice, but do not let other family members say "Well, you are living there. You won't need much income." That shouldn't even be discussed. You are giving up a lot. You cannot do it for free.
Please spend some time on this site searching through threads on the same topic and make sure you're making a good decision. You are giving up a LOT to do this and putting your own financial future at risk. Please go into this with your eyes open and make sure this makes good sense for everyone involved - mostly you, because you are giving up the most in this scenario.
And make sure you keep the social security taxes paid. You don't want your benefits to drop too much while you're doing something kind for your FIL. I know that he will also want to make sure you're being cared for. This is a tough thing you are doing, but I hope you find it enriching. It is easier if he is someone you like or love.
BTW, you can also do this as a self-employed person. Remember to ask for enough to pay 15.3% for self-employment tax (covers ss and Medicare), and keep good records of your expenses. And don't forget your own healthcare insurance, especially because in the near future pre-existing conditions may become a factor again. I'm in Alabama and I would probably charge family about $25 an hour if I were paying all my self-employment taxes. (I work for free, so how dumb am I?)
$200 per day. That is $25/hour for 8 hour days. You won't really work 8 hour days. Some days it will be 7 hours during the daytime and then 3 more in the evening. Or after an 8 hour day FIL might get you up 3 times in the night. In addition to what you do, some days your husband will also put some time in on house maintenance. So $200/day as a package deal would be fair. Can FIL be left alone sometimes? Will you have weekends off? Consider that as you set the fee.
And you absolutely have to discuss time off, right up front. No one can be a full time caregiver 24/7/365 and retain their sanity. Can't be done. And yet people often go into this without any notion of respite until they are approaching burn out. You need to have time to yourself. You need to have time with your husband that doesn't always include FIL. You need hours during each week. And you need vacation time. If FIL can manage on his own while you are gone (house cleaned and laundry done before you leave, with easy-to-microwave meals in the fridge) that is great! But if he needs someone with him, discuss how that is going to happen, before you even start.
Here are some things to think about if one is trying to decide whether to quit work to care for an aging parent.... on average if a working person quits work he/she will lose over the years between $285,000 and $325,000 which includes not only loss of salary over those years...
it also includes the net worth loss of the health insurance coverage.... loss of money being put into Social Security/Medicare..... loss of other benefits such as matching 401(k).... profit sharing.... workman's comp insurance.... company sponsored life insurance.... vacation pay, sick pay.... tuition assistance, etc. [source: in part Reuters 5/30/12]
You might be able to find a help agency (maybe a temp service) that will you could work with on the taxes, etc.; the patient pays the agency and they pay you, with the proper deductions, taxes. etc. We did this with my mother-in-law; I think it was social security who authorized a caregiver and referred us to an agency; we found our own caregiver through a neighbor whom she had worked for.
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Since you are quiting your job, please consider that you are no longer paying into your own retirement. That in itself will be costly.
You didn't ask for this advice, but do not let other family members say "Well, you are living there. You won't need much income." That shouldn't even be discussed.
You are giving up a lot. You cannot do it for free.
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And you absolutely have to discuss time off, right up front. No one can be a full time caregiver 24/7/365 and retain their sanity. Can't be done. And yet people often go into this without any notion of respite until they are approaching burn out. You need to have time to yourself. You need to have time with your husband that doesn't always include FIL. You need hours during each week. And you need vacation time. If FIL can manage on his own while you are gone (house cleaned and laundry done before you leave, with easy-to-microwave meals in the fridge) that is great! But if he needs someone with him, discuss how that is going to happen, before you even start.
Another article: https://www.agingcare.com/articles/quit-job-to-care-for-parents-150227.htm
Here are some things to think about if one is trying to decide whether to quit work to care for an aging parent.... on average if a working person quits work he/she will lose over the years between $285,000 and $325,000 which includes not only loss of salary over those years...
it also includes the net worth loss of the health insurance coverage.... loss of money being put into Social Security/Medicare..... loss of other benefits such as matching 401(k).... profit sharing.... workman's comp insurance.... company sponsored life insurance.... vacation pay, sick pay.... tuition assistance, etc. [source: in part Reuters 5/30/12]
A lot to think about.
Your employer is in deep trouble if they get caught.
You are an employee...so says the IRS
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