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Didi2001 Asked April 2017

My mom had double bypass heart surgery. She also is a diabetic, had 2 toes amputated. Would she be better off in a nursing home?

Didi2001 Apr 2017
My mom is in an assisted living facility that takes hospice. I feel she should be cleaner. Thought a nursing home would be more attentive.

jeannegibbs Apr 2017
Where is she now? A hospice house? Hospice can provide their services in a nursing home also. In what ways do you think that might be better?

You have to realize that persons qualify for hospice by being (as best a doctor can predict) within 6 months of the end of their life. It is not at all surprising that she has less and less interest in her usual activities, including her appearance. As she refuses pain meds, does she complain of pain? Maybe she doesn't need them, or could get by with something that wouldn't make her sleepy. My husband took no pain meds on hospice, but he did take meds to relieve anxiety. Each case is different.

Explain a little about the options of locations for mother, if that is what you want advice on.

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Didi2001 Apr 2017
After her surgery she went to skilled nursing facility then it was time to move on. Mom's surgeon said she cannot care for herself and is on hospice. She has her wits about her and has a great sense of humor. She's been in the facility for a month now. I've noticed a decline in her usual interests, books especially! She says she doesn't see clearly and objects look distorted. Now not the least bit interested in how she looks or hygiene. Her memory is worse. She has trust issues with the staff and I know it's because that pain pill is gonna make her sleep and groggy. Staff reports she's refusing meds and hospice team says she's telling all to get out and leave her alone. My mom's surgeon informed me that her heart is pumping at a low 19%. Incontinence is a big issue now. I was able to shower her there and takes coaxing (like I read in an article) but it worked. So, I'm asking after all this, would my mum be better off in a nursing home? Unfortunately there's no one's home for my mum to stay, no family members.

jeannegibbs Apr 2017
That is unfortunate. Are you her caregiver? Do you have a question for us?

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