Hugs, Onlygirl. This is a sad and frightening time for you.
Go on keeping your mother company and talking to her because even if you're not seeing a reaction (because she just can't produce one) she is still in there, and your being there will comfort her. You don't have to keep it up round the clock or anything, or talk for the sake of it, but stick to your normal routine.
I hope the hospice team will be able to give you sympathetic advice and explain what's going on.
My mom is 92 and misses my dad. i was with my parents for his decline and passing. Mom and i had many regrets on how we spent the last months with him. Mom had been quite alert and comprehended until a few days ago. Now she stares at me blankly and rarely responds. She is bedridden. She has no interests anymore.No matter the door i open for conversasion she doesnt seem interested . Is it wrong for me to want to understand her experience?What is she thinking while she lays there? Why doesnt she express what she expects or what she liked most in this lifetime?...like we talked about...
5thonlygirl, I see from your profile that your Mom has Parkinson's disease. Was Mom on Hospice prior going to the hospital for the UTI, or did the hospital recommend Hospice while Mom was there?
It is not unusual for a patient to rally to a point where everyone thinks that patient will make a good recovery. That sounds like what happened with your Mom.
As for telling Mom that her time is limited, I really think in her heart she already knows. I never told either of my parents. Why make their last days/months emotionally painful.
5th, I echo Jeanne's comments. Too often we struggle with what to say and how to say it! A good part of the time, our seniors just want to know that they will be taken care of. Keep it simple, Let her know you love her.
Also, I think having a UTI, especially if bad one, takes time to recover. Also, there would be initial time that one gets better because reduced/removed infection. So, I think the main focus of explanation should be about 'went from hospital to hospice'. Recovering from hospital visit/illness can take weeks, but if more going on, best to explain so can getter more informative feedback. Thanks for sharing.
She got much better "until now." Does that mean she is now getting worse? Can you explain how she has been doing since coming home? How long ago was that?
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Go on keeping your mother company and talking to her because even if you're not seeing a reaction (because she just can't produce one) she is still in there, and your being there will comfort her. You don't have to keep it up round the clock or anything, or talk for the sake of it, but stick to your normal routine.
I hope the hospice team will be able to give you sympathetic advice and explain what's going on.
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It is not unusual for a patient to rally to a point where everyone thinks that patient will make a good recovery. That sounds like what happened with your Mom.
As for telling Mom that her time is limited, I really think in her heart she already knows. I never told either of my parents. Why make their last days/months emotionally painful.
Too often we struggle with what to say and how to say it! A good part of the time, our seniors just want to know that they will be taken care of. Keep it simple, Let her know you love her.