How long can my mother come to my house for? I am wanting to try looking after her for two weeks in my home to see if I am able to care for her in my family.
More info is needed. Is your Mom in rehab/hospital and they are suggesting long term? If so, you are better to put her in long term now. IF you try to take care of her and find you can't, it will be a lot harder to get her in a long term facility.
Many people on this site have taken care of a loved one in their home, so of course it is possible. I think that two weeks is not really enough time to see how well things will work over the long term because she would still be thinking and behaving as a guest, unless of course you are clearly oil and water from the start. As a nurse you should have a clear idea of the challenges that come with caring for elders with dementia, but living the reality 24/7 is different than going to work and offering support for 8 hours and then being off duty. The success, or not, of your plan is predicated on so many variables that it is hard to advise one way or another. Read through the site about other caregiver's experiences, be prepared to be flexible and have a plan B.
I am no expert, but I will tell you that I had my mom live with me for two months, years ago when her dementia was just starting. She had broken her ankle and wrist, so she needed to be cared for after she got out of rehab. Unfortunately, we lived in two different states and after a month she wanted to go home. I waited the two full months and then took her home. She was so happy to be home but I decided to take a leave of absence with no pay, so I could help her. Two years ago I took early retirement and moved back to the home town where she was, as her dementia had seriously gotten worse. In May she decided that she wanted to go back to the Bahamas to see friends there, and I took her. She was so overwhelmed with the change, and kept asking when we were seeing our friends (we saw them every day) and also couldn't wait to get home. When we got home, she just kept getting worse and had a terrible time adjusting to her own home! I would think carefully about this, especially if your mom's dementia is getting worse. Much luck to you if you decide to do this!
Yes have considered all aspects with my husband and family and know that traditionally in our westernised environment many elderly live in aged care but I am wanting to bring her to my home for two weeks as a trial to see if I am able to do so effectively. I have been a Div 1 nurse so know what I am taking on but also know I need to trial it to decide smartly not emotionally only. she has Alzheimer's and I will be telling her that she is coming to our house for a holiday and won't be mentioning that it could be permanently. She is currently in an aged care facility in Melbourne and I live in a rural town.
What are the time constraints you have in mind? Is your question to do with...
her social security eligibility? deciding on what constitutes a worthwhile trial period? not wanting her to get her hopes up and then later having to dash them if it's not working out?
Not just the length of time needs to be considered, in any case. It's also a question of assessing her current needs and looking ahead at whether you could realistically meet them as they increase, too. And you have to think about your priorities, and how they might develop over time.
Many factors go into the decision. Would you like to say more about your situation?
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As a nurse you should have a clear idea of the challenges that come with caring for elders with dementia, but living the reality 24/7 is different than going to work and offering support for 8 hours and then being off duty. The success, or not, of your plan is predicated on so many variables that it is hard to advise one way or another. Read through the site about other caregiver's experiences, be prepared to be flexible and have a plan B.
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Two years ago I took early retirement and moved back to the home town where she was, as her dementia had seriously gotten worse. In May she decided that she wanted to go back to the Bahamas to see friends there, and I took her. She was so overwhelmed with the change, and kept asking when we were seeing our friends (we saw them every day) and also couldn't wait to get home. When we got home, she just kept getting worse and had a terrible time adjusting to her own home!
I would think carefully about this, especially if your mom's dementia is getting worse.
Much luck to you if you decide to do this!
her social security eligibility?
deciding on what constitutes a worthwhile trial period?
not wanting her to get her hopes up and then later having to dash them if it's not working out?
Not just the length of time needs to be considered, in any case. It's also a question of assessing her current needs and looking ahead at whether you could realistically meet them as they increase, too. And you have to think about your priorities, and how they might develop over time.
Many factors go into the decision. Would you like to say more about your situation?