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anonymous715665 Asked August 2017

Can I evict my mom?

I am at the end of my rope I can't do it anymore.  I know that sounds terrible but she is mean, hateful, lies and plays games. I have taken care of her for 16 years never taking a dime while my sister has taken money from her all the time. I have taken care of her longer than she took care of me, she started charging me rent at 15.

Katiekate Aug 2017
I do not know what state you live in....but, Google your state "landlord/tenant laws"

Typically you must give written notice of so many days. This can be as long as 3 months in some states. This is not an eviction notice. This is just a normal notice to terminate a tenancy.

If your Mom is still there on that day after the notice expires...now you decide if you want to proceed to an actual eviction. If the answer is yes...you go to the local count house and you file for evictions, ,the reason given is "hold over". You will be given a court date to appear. You pay the court costs and the cost of the court process server to serve your Mom. Go to court on the appointed day and have a judge hear your case.

You can expect life to get REALLY ugly with Mom once You begin this. But..it is the only legal way to remove her if she will not/cannot willingly go.

This may be the only way to impress on Mom that you are serious about this. Maybe sister too will "get it". 

Let me say...there might be another way....  call the police when Mom is going off on you.   Have her taken for a psych evaluation...then, do not let the hospital discharge her to your home.   You are under no obligation to take her...but they will try to pressure you like crazy.   Their social workers will find a placement for her if you refuse.  

anonymous715665 Aug 2017
So I have read my state (calif) I think she would qualify as a single lodger. I think I have to basicly given written notice I want her out by said date at least 30 days if she doesnt leave she is trespassing. I will let you know how things go.

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Kimber166 Aug 2017
Yes, you can evict her and it does take a little time. Start the process so she knows you are serious and will start looking for somewhere else to live.

Eyerishlass Aug 2017
If your mom didn't live with you where would she live? An assisted living facility? A nursing home? With another family member?

What are the options?

blannie Aug 2017
You sound totally burned out. What you are saying doesn't make you sound terrible, just frustrated and exhausted. I think evicting someone takes some time...maybe you should talk to an attorney first. How old is your mom? It sounds like she has some money if she's helping your sister out. Can she use that for rent somewhere else? You sound like a very caring daughter. Hang in there...

BarbBrooklyn Aug 2017
You had a guest house built for her and she doesn't pay rent.

What sort of care do you provide for your mom? If you stopped "doing" for her, would that ease the stress at all?

Have you called APS and reported your sister's financial abuse?

Have you considered charging mom rent, starting right now?

anonymous715665 Aug 2017
honestly i am at the point I dont care where she goes she has caused so much hurt with her lies and meanness i have no plans of contact with her once i get her out of my life i have a sister who has never done anything to help but she has no problem helping herself to my moms money i know this makes me sound like a awful person but if you knew the lies and games she has played with my life you would completely understand 

anonymous409206 Aug 2017
Clueless123, you do not have a clue!!


Tiredburnedout: the sooner you act, the better for both yourself and your mother. You must get one of the lawyers - yours or your mother's - to make a practical evaluation of your mother's assets and income in order to work out a plan for how she is going to support herself for the rest of her days. In doing so you can build in a protection for her against the depredations of your sister.
Then you must set the boundaries for both your own living space and your finances: after a dated deadline (eg 30 days or whatever is mutually agreed), there has to be an enforceable either/or: so either your mother stays and pays full rent, including for common services like water supply and yard upkeep, or she packs up and leaves, paying for her own removal expenses.
If your mother leaves, whether or not your sister continues to dun her for money will no longer be your problem.
if your mother stays, you can make it a condition that no payments can be made to your sister before all rental commitments, including utility bills, yard maintenance, local taxes etc etc have been paid in full. You could even set up a joint account for this.

Dad_Was_Robbed Aug 2017
Absolutely! If she's living in your home and proves to be a problem, definitely kick her to the curb. You also mentioned she was charging you rent at 15, what is wrong with her? You were a minor and where was CPS during this? It's illegal to go into a business agreement and make contracts with minors, she broke the law and maybe it's time your story falls on the right ears. You're right to come on here and speak up

Katiekate Aug 2017
You cannot evict without a cause. Non payment of rent...well, you never required rent..so you cannot use that now. Breach of the lease...well, you have no lease. Illegal activities...nope, not that either. Consistent breach of the peace...police called.....nope.

So..forget evict. She is considered a resident if she got Mail there...doesn't matter that she didn't pay rent.

Your only course is to follow the law concerning the termination of a resident. Give her notice to move. Only after she fails to move do you then have an acceptable reason to evict: "Hold-over"

You can go get a lawyer and pay a lot of money..and a lot of delays...but the process will remain the same, just you pay a bunch more.

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