My siblings and I suspect our brother, who has lived with our mother who has dementia for more than 15 yrs since our father died, has been mentally/physically abusing her. We already know he has financially abuses her assets for his own greedy needs because she made him POA over everything. Before she got so bad with dementia, she had all our names put on her home when she died, but when she got really bad off and he started taking over her bills, etc., we found out that he got a quick claim deed to her home and sold to him for $1.00 even though he owns a nice home that stays empty since he moved in with her over 15 yrs ago. We have already turned him in for elder abuse, but they say since Mom is not complaining and they talked to her, she says everthing is fine with her and happy he is living there, but we have heard that he threatens her not to say anthing. We just need some solid proof to show he is abusing her inside her home. Is it legal to install a hidden camera?
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There's a Hardcover Book Hidden Camera on Amazon. It looks just like a book but it's a camera. Less than $100.
All I can say is if I had a brother like you I would have sent her off to you and let you take care of her instead and wash my hands of it and live my own life. Instantly. Because you obviously think you can do better. Then I say go for it. Yes I would have signed over everything to you. Then go my merry way.
Grace + Peace,
Bob
I don't know, of course. But this man has been living with his demented mother and caring for her for fifteen years. The OP has discovered, who knows when, that s/he and other non-caregiving siblings are no longer in line to receive their share of the family home once their mother passes away.
So one is bound to wonder. What are they mainly concerned about? Their mother? And it's taken them fifteen years to get round to acting on their concerns?
One more thing. Since the OP seems to consider it feasible - whether or not legal/ethical - to place a hidden camera in the mother's home, then s/he and/or others must have reasonably free, unsupervised access to both the property and their mother. They have already called APS in, and APS were satisfied with the mother's living situation. So I wonder what they're trying to dig up, exactly. Footage of the poor bloke tearing his hair out at three in the morning? His reaction when mother throws her oatmeal at him? Mother in odd socks, or with tea spilt down her dress?
I will be happy to be corrected, but to me it sounds as though the issue is the siblings' suspicion that this caregiver is only in it for a quick buck (cue: hollow laughter) and is out to cheat them. Have you had any conversations with him about mother's assets and intentions?
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