Mom's nursing home wants all of her bank statements, account numbers, and the right to take her social security and pension, plus her house. Why would they do this?

Best idea, Bryort!

I am looking for a different NH being as how the owner was charged with embezzlement. Best advice I ever got was have an elder attorney. Never sign anything until you have a attorney read it. There is a lot people out to scam the elderly.

Contact an elder care attorney prior to signing any documents.

Veronica, I'm not challenging your answer but am wondering what the basis for taking SS and pension would be if fees were paid otherwise by her son.

I would think that there would need to be a shortage of assets to allow them access to a funding source from a governmental and/or privacy agency (i.e., the pension fund).

I think a trust is an excellent idea.

The nursing home is entitled to be paid their fees every month not have unlimited access to Mom's total financial situation. They can take her pension and SS as long as it does not exceed her monthly bills.
What they are afraid of is that Mom's money will be spent and she will have to apply for medicaid which pays a lot less than private pay.
Maybe a lawyer could put the money into some kind of trust that is only to be used to pay Mom's bills. If her money runs out the house of course will have to be turned into money for her care.
I certainly would not allow the nursing home to take control of Mom's money. You can't trust anyone these days. By all means they can run a credit report and request proof of funds just as you have to provide if you make an offer to purchase a house with cash.
Were you planning to spend some of your own money for Mom's care?

bryort, how is your Mom's credit if the nursing home did a financial back-ground check? Maybe if one's credit isn't the best, and that can happen with an elder who forgets to pay their bills, that could bring forward the request for paperwork on funds. No different than renting an apartment. Just a thought.

I can understand that they want proof of sufficient income, but I also would be reluctant to share that much information. I would specifically ask them why they want the info.

Are they advising they're going to get a credit report as well? One of the private pay private duty companies I contacted for home care advised me they intended to do that, and I balked. I understand their concern but I'm not opening the account books for them.

You seem pretty savvy, so I'd also draft a nondisclosure agreement binding them to confidentiality, and include some onerous provisions for breach of confidentiality. Since you've already contacted an attorney he/she might do that for you. If they know an attorney is involved, they should be alerted that you're not going to just provide them all the information they want, let alone confiscate her SS and lien the home.

Let them know that you're not just going to turn over all that personal information.

Is your mother at this facility now? If so, how long has she been there, or is she just entering it and this is a pre-requisite condition?

I honestly don't know how this all works, but you may have to show exactly how you Will be able to pay for her care, out of her Own investments for several years. They will probably never rely on just your say so, that You will pay, as obviously that is not a guarantee of payment.

Nursing homes don't/won't just go on your say so, so I do not see where it will hurt you to comply, as long as you know that there is sufficient monies to be had, as long as she is going to be a resident there.

It may be in your best interest, to go along in the event that you do need to get her onto Medicaid at some point, as you shouldn't be responsible to pay out of your own pocket, unless you wish to.

Well, that is my take on it anyways! Good luck!

I am sure not going to just sign over every thing to NH. All they need is proof I can pay. Never give a NH complete control over all your assets per lawyer.

This is private pay. No medicaid is not involved. Mom does not qualify for medicaid and it would be a good ten years before she does. I have never even applied for medicaid.

This sounds like a Medicaid form. Sorry, this is how it works. Any SS and Pension will go towards Mom's care. She will receive about $35 a month for personals. Medicaid will not make u sell the house but in my situation I had it up for sale. They will, at time of your Mom's passing, a lean for her care will be put against the house. Since Medicaid means there are no other assets than the house, you will have to upkeep the house or sell. I chose to sell.

They may want proof you can pay for their services longterm and not stick them with lower Medicaid payments in a month or two. The majority
of people in a nursing home are on Medicaid so they're used to that.

Bryort, it sounds like Medicaid is going to help cover for the cost of the nursing home for your Mom, as normally nursing homes don't ask for personal financial information. This is info that Medicaid normally asks.

My Mom was in a nursing home for awhile, and she was self-pay, but the monthly cost was very expensive, $12k per month, yes per month. Not too many people can afford that. The cost can vary from area to area.

Whatever you do, do NOT use your own money. You need that money for your own retirement and later down the road if your need to move into Independent Living, Assisted Living, or a Nursing Home.