My mother moved in with us 3 years ago. She is a hoarder and has a hard time getting around. She has recently been falling and she cannot see that she cannot stay alone anymore. I work full time as does my husband. She cannot afford assisted living but she is a danger to herself. She leaves the stove on and oven on at times. She is only 69. When she moved in here I told her I couldnt be a full time caregiver to her, my daughter is in college and I have one in high school. She hasnt made me or my sister POA when the doctors have told her over and over that she needed to. Not sure what options I have or she would have, but something has got to change. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
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I'd follow the other poster's advice. Have her evaluated and see what kind of state she's really in. You need fresh eyes on the problem. She might not be able to live with you any longer if she is left alone for long periods.
And yes, you do need her to agree to SOMEBODY looking over her "affairs".
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Or you can get an attorney paid for by mom to assign you guardian.
I'm very sorry to hear what you are going through. Have you had your mom's doctor review her meds? I wonder if the side effects of the meds is also affecting her behaviour.
Safety is a major concern. My other suggestion would be talking to a social worker and see what options are available in the community. If your mom cannot be alone hopefully the social worker can help you find some alternate care arrangements.