When long distance care giving, what do you do when your parent is in pain?

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newzealandsue Asked September 2017

When long distance care giving, what do you do when your parent is in pain?

HI everyone Sue here in New Zealand; does anyone have any recommendations on long distance care giving; my Mum is in England and I am in New Zealand; I have been to England for 5 weeks in the past three months to see my lovely Mum. My Mum has some good carers but I really struggle when I hear from her on the phone that she is in pain. I feel very sad that she is in pain and I can't take that away. I would love to hear if any one has any thoughts on how they have dealt with this. Many thanks Susan

Care Decisions Long-distance Caregiving New to Caregiving

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score 0 · Answer 1

Dear Susan Thanks so much for sharing; I am so sorry to hear that your Mum passed away. God Bless you. My Mum has had lots of fractures so that seems to be the type of pain she is having. You feel so isolated being so far away but I am going to have grief counselling to help me with my emotions. Sorry again to hear about your Mum
God Bless us all Susan

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Hi Sue. I'm A Susan well. So incredibly sorry to hear about your mom's struggles with pain. Does she have cancer pain or just general pains?

Pain meds are tricky. My mother died in April and she didn't react well to many of them. Gabapentrin literally knocked her out. I know you are having the carers keep a close eye. It is difficult, most of all for mom. God bless the both of you.

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Thank you so much for commenting there
I am very grateful to you; I have got the Gp and carers to get involved ; reading between the lines she is in acute pain; I will say lots of prayers for her and all her needs
every day. I hope your relative is well too thanks sue

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score 2 · Answer 4

You don't say much about mums condition. Is she a person that's always in pain or complains of every little pain? I'm long distance also but not THAT far. You have to learn to read between the lines.

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When long distance care giving, what do you do when your parent is in pain?

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