I don't understand why most posts appear to think I did this for ME? Maybe I just didn't explain well enough! I actually did it for my mom because this is the kind of thing she LOVES!! Being with family. I guess maybe it made a difference as she evidently isn't as progressed with her dementia as most assumed. I don't know and it doesn't matter, whether she will remember the trip but it did not seem to cause any anxiety and she appeared to enjoy being with family.
I guess I look at this caregiving life a little different. I always try to be sure my mom is cared for in the best way possible... This is why she stays in my home and I make accommodations for her. That said, I still have to have a life as well. I listen to many people on more that one of these chat rooms and they have given up everything and are bitter. I try to balance things. Yes it is a bit more work to drag mom to my grandson's baptism, with her big wheelchair that reclines... Knowing she may rambles through the service, but it was important for us to be there and it didn't hurt her, so we went. Everyone was happy she was there.
If it is important to you that your mom has the opportunity to see your new home, and it will not be detrimental to her health, then you should take her. You will be able to carry the memory of sharing it with your mom forever. If she forgets in an hour, who cares, you still had that moment and that is what matters.
At the risk of being blunt, what do believe that your mom would get out of visiting your new home? How would this visit benefit her? I wonder if she would totally forget the experience in 10 mins. Could be upsetting if you had travel a distance. I use this phrase when it comes to memories; "First in, last out. Last in, first out." Thus she may remember her childhood home (first in), but not your new home (last-in, first). I can totally understand your Didier to share your new house with your mother. But it is unlikely she will remember it.
It's a personal decision, but, I'd try to gauge if she really would get much from it. If she enjoys the ride and just seeing you, it might be nice. Does she get disoriented when she leaves the facility? That was a problem with my LO, so trips have to seriously be considered. I think that sometimes we still see things through our eyes and our minds, but, they do not see things the way we may want. I'd be careful to not keep reminding her if she forgets soon after seeing the house. It might make her feel bad that she can't recall it. Since they have trouble with remembering new things so much, I might take photos of the people she knows in the new house. She might appreciate that more.
If YOU want her to see the house, for a sense of pride in it, knowing beforehand she may not even know what she's looking at--I don't see the harm. Sounds like you care a lot more than she does--and that's OK.
Don't expect her to ooh and aah over what you've got now--it may just not resonate with her.
Sorry... Mom (91)has been in a nursing care home for about 3 months, prior to that an assissted living home (4 years). We have been in process of building for a couple years and have been sharing pics off and on and of course telling her I would bring her out to see it when done. ( I live 20 miles away) We noticed some dementia symptoms prob s couple years ago. She still knows her kids and some grandkids but asks for her mom a lot lately ( been gone 20 plus years) And sometimes ref her husband as though he were still alive.
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If it is important to you that your mom has the opportunity to see your new home, and it will not be detrimental to her health, then you should take her. You will be able to carry the memory of sharing it with your mom forever. If she forgets in an hour, who cares, you still had that moment and that is what matters.
I wonder if she would totally forget the experience in 10 mins. Could be upsetting if you had travel a distance.
I use this phrase when it comes to memories; "First in, last out. Last in, first out." Thus she may remember her childhood home (first in), but not your new home (last-in, first).
I can totally understand your Didier to share your new house with your mother. But it is unlikely she will remember it.
Don't expect her to ooh and aah over what you've got now--it may just not resonate with her.
When my mother could no longer visit my home I took pictures to show her, mainly of indoor and outdoor plants as they bloomed.