Hello, I live in California and my mom gets money from her annuity and Social Security but was wondering what would be more affordable a live in or Assisted Living? She is very difficult and is verbally abusive she can barely walk and falls a lot she is too heavy for me to lift when she falls . She lives in my nephews house and refuses to pay rent so she can save money for her own place so he has to sell his place . She went to go see if she can qualify for a mobile home because a house is to expensive but she needs more income so my boyfriend was willing to co-sign for her but she is now saying, he can't live there because a friend is going to take care of her ? This women has no friends and family has turned their backs on her because of her behavior even though she is mean I still try to help because she is my mother but now I have to look after myself and now she is upset saying her kids should take care of her and how she hopes we go through the same thing! I agree it sucks getting old but how can anyone help if the person is difficult and threatens you and wants everything their way ! Only thing I can think of is a professional caretaker or assistant living and don't know what the cost of that would be?
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So, my take on this...the 24 hour caregiver is already required...so assisted living would be an additional expense...not instead. Assisted living does not provide that level of care.
Perhaps you mean a nursing home vs live-in caregiver?
At the typical $20 per hour for live-in care... that is $3300 per week
The typical nursing home at $300 per day is $2100 per week.
The additional level of care may make the nursing somewhat more costly..but I think it will still work out cheaper,
One thing I would point out.,.she may be abusive to in-home caregivers..but the nursing home will not tolerate it.
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As stated above, DO NOT let your boyfriend co-sign a loan with her!
"She is very difficult and is verbally abusive she can barely walk and falls a lot she is too heavy for me to lift when she falls ." You do not have to put up with abuse and you can injure yourself if you have to lift her.
Just how involved are you with her care now?
My Dad had 3 shifts of caregivers, and that was quiet expensive, like $20,000 per month, yes per month. We found that by him moving in Independent Living, and later into Memory Care, that cost was more an half that of having around the clock caregivers, closer to $6,000 per month. The cost depends on location.
As for your boy-friend co-signing on the purchase of a mobile home.... NO !!! I think I remember that your Mom loved to shop off of the shopping network, correct? If for some reason your Mom defaults on the loan for the mobile home, then your boy-friend would have to make all of the monthly payments, or go into default himself. That would ruin his credit for quite some time.
Can you clarify why your nephew would need to sell his house just because your Mom won't pay rent? Is the house rental property? And the only way to have Mom leave is to sell the house?