What if you're no longer married to the Veteran and are suffering from dementia. Can you still get asisstance from VA?

I remember when my mother's health declined and she went to apply for Medicaid, the case worker at DCF said that since she was married to my dad for 8 years, she had to apply and get denied by the VA before she could qualify for Medicaid. Apparently they had to exhaust any other resources before she would qualify for Medicaid. The case worker said at the time (this was back in 2011) that "typically" you needed to be married to the veteran for 10 years, but a phone call to VA couldn't hurt.