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buster2950 Asked January 2018

My 95 year old mum has vascular demetia and lung cancer, she is sleeping 22 hours a day and is eating nothing. I'm worried how long there is.

With me is eating nothing, I'm worried how long she will last at this rate. There is only myself and mum and I want to do the right thing for her as she is living with me.

littlemisskitty Feb 2018
My mother died of cancer and we didn't know she was going to die from it and she was still fighting when the second opinion doctor was honest with us and said she had only weeks to live. She was put on pain meds and I knew in my heart it would be more like a week or two. Within a week she had passed and it was peaceful. Before that time though we didn't have hospice involved and honestly I regret it. She was in pain and was pushing through it but could have been spared it and been in peace earlier without suffering. You will know when it's time and if in doubt make a call. The worst they can tell you is that it's not time yet. My thoughts will be with you. Hospice can help. Don't be afraid of them. The time will come and they will help make it peaceful. Cancer can be very painful and scary and hospice can bring peace to them instead of letting them suffer.

buster2950 Feb 2018
you are such lovely lovely people, thankyou so much for being with me at this sad time. god bless xx

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momof2angels Jan 2018
As the other individual stated, please contact Hospice immediately. They will be an invaluable resource to you and will ensure that your mother is comfortable and experiences as little pain as possible. My mother passed away two days before Christmas. She was in an assisted living facility and had dementia but always knew the family members. Hospice had been brought in six months earlier. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your mother.

Arwen31 Jan 2018
Thinking of you buster2950, and of your mom. You are doing something great, and brave. I hope you'll get some help though. In any case you are not alone. I've been there too, and I'll be thinking of you.

buster2950 Jan 2018
thank you all for help and advise will speak to nurses tomorrow, god bless

cdnreader Jan 2018
Dear Buster,

I am so sorry. I know its hard. I made this mistake with my dad. I failed to realize he was dying when he slept so much. He was in the hospital for heart failure. The nurse even questioned me about him sleeping so much, but I thought it was normal. But it wasn't and three days later he passed away. I feel so foolish for not recognizing this because I wanted him to have his family around him one more time.

Please do as the others have suggested and get hospice care involved. Thinking of you during this difficult time.

jeannegibbs Jan 2018
We brought hospice in when my husband slept 20+ hours a day. I think it is the right thing for you to do, now.

Katiekate Jan 2018
Get hospice involved now. Call today.

The hospice nurse told me this...when the downward changes are noticeable from one month to the next..there is only months left.
When those downward changes are happening from one week to the next, there is weeks left....
When the changes are from one day to the next, these is only a few days remaining.

Judge for yourself what time frame you may be looking at now.
I know that for my Mom, hospice was brought in when he pain was no longer manageable. She was sleeping 22 hours a day, and in pain and not eating when awake.

Get hospice involved. Lung cancer is a terribly painful way to go. No reason to allow anyone to die that way.

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