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alanat7777email Asked January 2018

What can be done about someone with dementia who thinks they are fine and is in charge of the finances?

They insist on handling everything and forget a lot but remain in denial, they are constantly losing money and screwing up their bank accounts but will not accept help. The worst part is they are completely contrary about everything and refuse any help, and are getting worse day by day. I am concerned that they will go broke soon and they are giving money away and paying 2, 3 and even 4 times for the same thing because of forgetfulness. I can't make them understand they need help, as they insist they are fine. Does anyone else have this problem and has anyone else found an answer ?

Windyridge Jan 2018
Could use some more details but will say this....

My dad began developing dementia about 6 years ago. I was only kid left, saw where this was leading. I used  the JUST IN CASE SOMETHING EVER HAPPENS TO YOU OR MOM.......

Got them to sign POA and banking paperwork. I slowly took over finances as things fell apart.

It may be too late for this in your case but worth a try.

freqflyer Jan 2018
Alan, whoever is the financial Power of Attorney needs to jump in here. Have that person slowly start transferring all the bills over to their own address, and to re-do the checking account to include your Mom's name and the POA's name so that the POA can sign checks. If done slowly enough, Mom [I assume that is who you are writing about as per your profile] might not even notice.

As my Dad got older, and after my own Mom had passed, Dad's caregiver started to find current bills in the wastepaper basket and in the recycling. Dad was clueless about this chore as my late Mom did the bill paying. I then started doing change of address on the bills over to my house, even bank statements. And re-did the checkbook with Dad being with me at the bank.

You mentioned "giving money away". To whom is the money going? That quickly has to be resolved if for some reason your Mom may need Medicaid [which is different from Medicare] the giving away of money is a red flag. No need to mention this to your Mom, as I don't think she is at a point where she could still understand :(

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JoAnn29 Jan 2018
bumping u up.

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