Mother is behind on nursing home payments. What can we do?
She is making monthly payments but is not paying down the balance fast enough for the facility. They are threatening to evict her over the past due balance. What can we do? We do not have the money to pay the home.
If she doesn’t pay for her housing she will have to move. Let’s start from the beginning. Does your mom have capacity to make her own decisions? Does she have the income to pay bills but has lost the desire to be responsible? Does she drive? Does she have credit cards? If she is in over her head with debt then that is one problem. If she doesnt have adequate income that’s another issue. If she has not been evaluated by a neurologist to establish competence she needs to be since you indicate that she has dementia. Do you have the authority to act for her via a DPOA? The worst thing you can do is subsidize her income without getting all your ducks in a row. The AlF must be paid or a cheaper one found. Her car and insurance etc might need to be eliminated or whatever expenses she has that can help her get caught up. Give us more information so we can better help you. EDIT I just saw you gave more info. Medicaid does not cover ALF that I am aware of. But a visit to a certified elder attorney might help. You say she has no assets, does she have income? Has her income changed since she moved in? Has the price gone up? I’m trying to understand where it went wrong. When she got behind and why?
Bunny, sounds like you are trying to clean up someone else's mistakes. Going higher might work - many times the lower level people do not have authority to do much.
JoAnn It was on bunny’s profile that her mom is in ALF.
BUNNY Was there a misunderstanding about when the LTC would begin? I’m not familiar with the bridge loan. You can go to the search box for this website and enter that term and see what comes up. However, the word loan indicates repayment. Ask the ALF about how the county assistance is accessed. Perhaps you could call Area Agency on Aging and discuss this problem. When the ALF can’t squeeze blood from a turnip they might agree that the SS payment and the LTC payments add up to more than the county assistance provides. The problem might be that the person you are dealing with does not have the authority to do anything but push for payment. See if you can elevate your level of contact. Ask if there is someone else you can speak with that might have the authority to evaluate your moms situation. Explain they are leaving you with little recourse but to move your mom as mom is already giving them all she has. Surely this has happened before...that the LTC didn’t kick in. Have you exhausted all negotiations with the LTC? Perhaps another poster will have experience with getting LTC to pay retroactively?? I’m not personally familiar with any of this, just trying to help you think through your options. I would probably get am elder attorney familiar with LTC and Medicaid to look the contract over.
The payment schedule that they have us on is not manageable. They are really pushing for this lump sum payment. I will try to contact the Ombudsman.. They have been working with us and it's as if we are not paying down the balance fast enough..I appreciate all of the suggestions!
I am confused, I see nothing that says this is an AL? If it is, weren't you aware of Moms finances and how much you had to work with? Or, has the cost of Moms care gone up meaning she needs more care? At Moms AL I was informed increases would be made each January and if she needed more care her care cost would go up. I am assuming that Mom is using her SS and a pension for her care? She has no extra assets? If this is an AL you may have to move her to a NH that excepts Medicaid. The balance to the AL will need to be paid. Really need more info.
Bunny, I can't agree more with those who recommend the Area Agency on Aging. They were most helpful at directing me on the steps to take and in what order in August 2017 when I had to hurriedly get my mother into a nursing home. The business manager at the LTC facility was also helpful. Your mother's LTC facility should have a licensed social worker who is there to help HER. At my mother's LTC facility the LSW was overworked and had no time to help me. I couldn't have done it without AgingCare.com where I had been lurking and researching for over a year before I finally was forced by Mom's condition to act. I was armed with a wealth of information from this forum. Because of AgingCare.com and researching Ohio Revised Code I was able to draft a Miller Trust (QIT, Qualified Income Trust...for Medicaid eligibility), Durable Power of Attorney, Health Care Power of Attorney, Funeral Directive (Mom wanted to be cremated and without this document ALL SIX siblings would have to agree. I knew one of my five siblings would vehemently disagree and toss the entire thing into probate court upon her death), get everything signed by Mom and notarized in about seven days. I could then open two checking accounts (personal for Mom with me as POA, QIT account with me as Trustee), sell her house, pay off the mortgage, close out all her utilities and pay her final bills, change her mailing address to my address, liquidate her meager assets, talk with her Medigap insurer as her POA, pre-plan and pay for what she and I jokingly referred to as her ZipLock Baggie funeral, apply for Medicaid as her authorized representative (another paper she had to sign) and FINALLY hurry up and wait on Medicaid. I wouldn't recommend EVERYONE try to handle all the legal papers without an attorney but, although it seems daunting, they aren't as difficult as you might think. Your states codified legal code (legislation, regulation and executive orders) may actually have one or more of the necessary forms written word for word into the code which you can find online, copy into word processing software and personalize. Your state's Bar Association may also have downloadable forms to fill out. It didn't hurt that I'm pursuing a degree as a paralegal and thus had some helpful legal knowledge. I should also admit that I flunked the semester that I was taking care of Mom's needs. I made it to class and have the information in my brain but didn't have time to complete many of the assignments. Mom first!! Medicaid was approved on December 29, 2017. The following day I held her hand as she peacefully passed into Eternity due to respiratory failure caused by COPD and complicated by congestive heart failure. She was surrounded by five of her six children, thirteen of her twenty-one grandchildren and one of her four great-grandchildren. I'm thankful that I was able to take a load off of her in her final days. Come next fall it's back to college to take the classes I failed once more. I hope I've helped someone. Cheerio! Cindy
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They try to settle disputes.
Let’s start from the beginning.
Does your mom have capacity to make her own decisions?
Does she have the income to pay bills but has lost the desire to be responsible?
Does she drive? Does she have credit cards?
If she is in over her head with debt then that is one problem. If she doesnt have adequate income that’s another issue.
If she has not been evaluated by a neurologist to establish competence she needs to be since you indicate that she has dementia.
Do you have the authority to act for her via a DPOA?
The worst thing you can do is subsidize her income without getting all your ducks in a row.
The AlF must be paid or a cheaper one found. Her car and insurance etc might need to be eliminated or whatever expenses she has that can help her get caught up.
Give us more information so we can better help you.
EDIT
I just saw you gave more info.
Medicaid does not cover ALF that I am aware of.
But a visit to a certified elder attorney might help.
You say she has no assets, does she have income? Has her income changed since she moved in? Has the price gone up?
I’m trying to understand where it went wrong. When she got behind and why?
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It was on bunny’s profile that her mom is in ALF.
BUNNY
Was there a misunderstanding about when the LTC would begin?
I’m not familiar with the bridge loan. You can go to the search box for this website and enter that term and see what comes up. However, the word loan indicates repayment.
Ask the ALF about how the county assistance is accessed. Perhaps you could call Area Agency on Aging and discuss this problem.
When the ALF can’t squeeze blood from a turnip they might agree that the SS payment and the LTC payments add up to more than the county assistance provides. The problem might be that the person you are dealing with does not have the authority to do anything but push for payment. See if you can elevate your level of contact. Ask if there is someone else you can speak with that might have the authority to evaluate your moms situation. Explain they are leaving you with little recourse but to move your mom as mom is already giving them all she has.
Surely this has happened before...that the LTC didn’t kick in.
Have you exhausted all negotiations with the LTC?
Perhaps another poster will have experience with getting LTC to pay retroactively??
I’m not personally familiar with any of this, just trying to help you think through your options.
I would probably get am elder attorney familiar with LTC and Medicaid to look the contract over.
They have been working with us and it's as if we are not paying down the balance fast enough..I appreciate all of the suggestions!
I couldn't have done it without AgingCare.com where I had been lurking and researching for over a year before I finally was forced by Mom's condition to act. I was armed with a wealth of information from this forum. Because of AgingCare.com and researching Ohio Revised Code I was able to draft a Miller Trust (QIT, Qualified Income Trust...for Medicaid eligibility), Durable Power of Attorney, Health Care Power of Attorney, Funeral Directive (Mom wanted to be cremated and without this document ALL SIX siblings would have to agree. I knew one of my five siblings would vehemently disagree and toss the entire thing into probate court upon her death), get everything signed by Mom and notarized in about seven days. I could then open two checking accounts (personal for Mom with me as POA, QIT account with me as Trustee), sell her house, pay off the mortgage, close out all her utilities and pay her final bills, change her mailing address to my address, liquidate her meager assets, talk with her Medigap insurer as her POA, pre-plan and pay for what she and I jokingly referred to as her ZipLock Baggie funeral, apply for Medicaid as her authorized representative (another paper she had to sign) and FINALLY hurry up and wait on Medicaid. I wouldn't recommend EVERYONE try to handle all the legal papers without an attorney but, although it seems daunting, they aren't as difficult as you might think. Your states codified legal code (legislation, regulation and executive orders) may actually have one or more of the necessary forms written word for word into the code which you can find online, copy into word processing software and personalize. Your state's Bar Association may also have downloadable forms to fill out. It didn't hurt that I'm pursuing a degree as a paralegal and thus had some helpful legal knowledge. I should also admit that I flunked the semester that I was taking care of Mom's needs. I made it to class and have the information in my brain but didn't have time to complete many of the assignments. Mom first!!
Medicaid was approved on December 29, 2017. The following day I held her hand as she peacefully passed into Eternity due to respiratory failure caused by COPD and complicated by congestive heart failure. She was surrounded by five of her six children, thirteen of her twenty-one grandchildren and one of her four great-grandchildren.
I'm thankful that I was able to take a load off of her in her final days. Come next fall it's back to college to take the classes I failed once more. I hope I've helped someone.
Cheerio!
Cindy
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