Why can't I make up my mind when it comes to my mom's care?
My mom's 76 a double amputee within a year. I agreed to nursing home against my will. No advanced directive, she had Medicade when I didbsfission in June. I want her here, but then again I want hospice, not suffering. What am I supposedto do?
You can't make up your mind because all of the choices are horrible. I'm so sorry that you are having to go through this painful experience.
Be guided by your mother's clinical team about what is best for her physical comfort. Take into account any preference she can express, but remember that you can't rely on it because it may be totally unrealistic or rooted in her natural wish just not to be in her current condition.
Your uncertainty all by itself proves that you are just trying to find the best answer - it's deciding what that is which is so difficult. Do accept help from the people around you. I think it was Surprise who said earlier today: "[hospice] know what to do. For us, this is our first rodeo and not one we want."
Vhall, I'm so sorry that you are in such pain over your mom's condition.
What was the alternative to her being in a NH that you wanted?
If Hospice is being offered, have you talked to them about what they can and cannot provide? For many posters here, Hospice helped their parents, They got stronger and "graduated" and lived longer than initially predicted. In otber words, Hospce is NOT a death sentence.
What life-limiting illness is causing her providers to recommend Hospice?
2 Answers
Helpful Newest
First Oldest
First
Be guided by your mother's clinical team about what is best for her physical comfort. Take into account any preference she can express, but remember that you can't rely on it because it may be totally unrealistic or rooted in her natural wish just not to be in her current condition.
Your uncertainty all by itself proves that you are just trying to find the best answer - it's deciding what that is which is so difficult. Do accept help from the people around you. I think it was Surprise who said earlier today: "[hospice] know what to do. For us, this is our first rodeo and not one we want."
What was the alternative to her being in a NH that you wanted?
If Hospice is being offered, have you talked to them about what they can and cannot provide? For many posters here, Hospice helped their parents, They got stronger and "graduated" and lived longer than initially predicted. In otber words, Hospce is NOT a death sentence.
What life-limiting illness is causing her providers to recommend Hospice?
ADVERTISEMENT