I have full blown caregiver burnout. Seeing a therapist but old friend is angry at my lack of attention.

thanks. Truth is a combination of both. I have been neglecting everyone including myself except of course, my mom. However, my friend is a spoiled and has plenty of time. He is well aware of my situation and just feels I neglect him. I will move on though because it is not healthy to feel I have to defend what I do. Thank you all for your help. This is a non-issue now. I am facing a decline with my mom and "have bigger fish to fry". I really appreciate the forum to vent and wishing you all the very best.

Have you explained to this person where your life is at now? If you used to speak with them every day, or perhaps multiple times a day and suddenly started speaking only once a month, I think more than anger, she’s wondering what happened. Some people are very secretive about what’s going on. I’m not like that sometimes unfortunately. Everyone knows my business. Speak with her honestly and explain what’s going on. If she remains “angry”, then move on.

No. It was nothing like that. Although I admit to needing to keeping in touch sometimes when you think "I should send this person a text or call" another crisis comes along and before you know it almost a month has gone by. This is the only friend that is like that. Most are going through their own issues and pick up where we left off when one of us reaches out. But I appreciate another perspective to mull over.

Angry at your lack of attention..?

Angry - what did s/he say to make you think so?

Lack of attention - attention to what? E.g. turning down a girls' night out, not reasonable to be angry. But, for example, failing to respond to her daughter's wedding invitation or her decree nisi, she's right, you are getting too wrapped up inside, you do need to reconnect.

Thank you all for your on point responses. At this point I am always wondering if I am over-reacting. I don't feel like myself so I am never sure if its me or them. Thanks for affirmation

Even though she is in independant living you have a lot of responsibility. If she doesn't understand this, she is self centered. If you have explained things to her than she is the problem. When she whines just say you have explained your Moms needs outweigh yours at this time. Don't say ur sorry. You have done nothing wrong.

Ah--the "friends" who disappear when the going gets tough. My Dh went through about 3 years of really bad health, and I 'lost' so many "friends". Someone who cannot roll with the punches of life with you is no friend.

I'm with Ahmijoy. Your "friend" is being a jerk. And that's putting it mildly.

WHAT?! You have a friend who’s angry with you because you need help, you’re getting it and along the way you cannot dance attendance on them? This is no “friend” my dear. Stop all contact with this person and explain to them you will get back to them when you are better. And then don’t.