At the moment I am living with my parents and grandmother on a modest but spacious property. My grandmother came to live with us 6 years ago when she finally accepted the fact she needed help. She was diagnosticated a year or so earlier with an early stage of alzheimer. The contributing factor was...alcohol. It's a bit shameful to admit but my grandmother was an alcoholic. Not the glass of wine type but the strong beer and spirits kind (+vulgar language and so on). This was the reason that we didn't really keep in touch... After a few scares and trips to the hospital we finally convinced her to move in with us (hospice was out of question because of her drinking habit). We had a few trying years where we stopped buying alcohol altogether (adieu rose wine, mimosa, bellini) and had to face the wrath of a vulgar recovering alcoholic. Things mellowed down, the disease progressed and I had my degree and the possibility to work from home most part of the week. Now, we notice an upsetting and alarming new behaviour. She started to destroy things. It started small a few moths ago, when she started to rip into pieces her diaper (we use diapers that are like underwear) and escalated when last week at the table she simple threw the plate with food to the ground. The food tasted fine (we all had the same) but after a few bites she just threw it... Another strange behaviour is that she started to hurt cats by grabbing them really hard by the tail and not letting go till the cry or lash out. There are other things,of course, but these are the most serious. I understand that she may be bored, now that it is winter and the garden can't be used with all the snow. The indoor activities are also limited because the disease advanced quite a lot (no cooking, no reading- she gets frustrated whenever she tries it). But despite these facts, I would like to find a way to stop or even mellow down her destructive behaviour. I mostly work from home so I can keep an eye on her but I can't pay attention all the time...So any idea and advice will be great. Thank you in advance.
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The behavior you describe is something addressed with distracting the patient, providing them with activities, tasks, busy work, music, etc. The idea is that they may be bored and they need stimulation, despite the dementia. But, that may not be sufficient. Medication is also an option and I'd explore that. Tearing up things by a dementia patient, is not what you might think. My LO tore up things that she loved, so I know it was not intentional on her part. Baby proofing the entire house may be required for their own protection. Like removing all sharp objects, medication, cleaners, etc. They can get into all kinds of things that you wouldn't even think about.
Ripping things up is not uncommon for PWD. Maybe she needs help with changing her disposable brief (diaper). As the Alzheimer's progresses, you may see many behaviors, obsessions, delusions and/or hallucinations. You might want to start watching video by Teepa Snow and read about validation by Naomi Feil. This will help prepare you to handle some of what is coming.
It is kind of you to care for your grandmother. Come back often to get help as you learn how to handle this situation.
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