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Makinmecrazy Asked April 2018

Home alone or constant care?

My dad doesn't want anybody with him. He argues with anyone that is there. We have video of him and an app on our phone to alert us of movement. Now he does not obey when we tell him to go back in house or stop. He is being combative and refusing to go to appointments. Is there any other option other than nursing home? He still knows us and I don't want him to feel abandoned.

freqflyer Apr 2018
Makinmecrazy, have your Dad tested for an Urinary Tract Infection by his primary doctor. Such an infection can make someone who is older get defiant.

SueC1957 Apr 2018
Has your father been diagnosed with any kind of dementia?
Do YOU think he has dementia?

IF he is of sound mind, there is nothing you can do but wait for the inevitable to happen. Elders in their right mind have the same rights as everybody else, even though they make poor decisions.
Also, parents aren't used to taking orders from their children, so it's perfectly understandable that he resents your intrusion.

IF he has dementia then his behaviors will only get worse. There will come a time when he will have to be removed from his home and have 24 hour care.

IF he hasn't been diagnosed and you think he's showing signs of dementia, try whatever way you can to get him to a geriatric neurologist or another practitioner that can assess his mental status.

I'm sorry for you. This is one of the hard parts about elderly parents. We're all on the same rough road.

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shad250 Apr 2018
Your dad has decided the way he wants to live his life.

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