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sguyton83 Asked May 2018

My mother has been asleep for nearly 2 days and won't wake up...is this normal?

My 87 year old mother with dementia has been asleep for nearly 2 whole days. I've tried to wake her but she just stays asleep. I've been giving her small amounts of liquid which she will swallow. I haven't got her to eat anything though.

MountainMoose May 2018
Relieved for you and your mom, sguyton83, that she's not in any pain. I'm sorry for you with her though. I was in your shoes last month. Mom's hospice nurses said it's best just to let her sleep and try not to rouse her. Mom may have been having TIAs and they said she just needs to sleep. Her body will wake her up if need be.

It's hard, but I and my sisters did our best to keep her body in comfort and send off her spirit in peace. {hug}

sguyton83 May 2018
She is still sleeping. The nurse came by to check her vitals, which are fine. She is breathing normally and isn't in any pain.

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worriedinCali May 2018
Her mom is on hospice, hospice is who she needs to call not 911

ohmeowzer May 2018
Call 911right away ,,,

worriedinCali May 2018
Sguyton83, how is mom doing? In this situation, hospice is to be called not 911. Its not uncommon for this to happen but it could be a stroke or something else. If she's sleeping hospice will not want you to drug her. Its entirely up to you, you don't have to give her any medication.

Midkid58 May 2018
Knowing your mom in under Hospice care changes everything!

Yes, in this situation, sleeping non stop IS normal. Her body is shutting down. Call Hospice and talk to your contact there.

Yes, Hospice will provide drugs to keep the patient out of pain, that's what they're for. They don't "come in and drug her to death" death occurs naturally and in peace.

Sounds like you need to wrap your brain around the fact that mom is in her last days or weeks of life. I am sorry for your situation, so many of us have been right where you are.

Nothing is "wrong" death is as natural as can be. Please don't let your mom be in pain, ok? Even giving her liquids by mouth can be excruciating to someone whose digestive system is shut down.

Please get some help from your hospice support group.

JoAnn29 May 2018
Does your Mom seem to respond that you are giving her liquid. Does she open her mouth to receive the liquid? A couple of weeks before my Mom passed, she first refused to get out of bed. She closed her eyes and never opened them again. She didn't want to be touched and reacted by pulling her arm away. But never opened her eyes. I was called and told she no longer could swallow, thats when I asked for hospice. You do need to call them. A nurse can tell you if she is in her final days.

Ahmijoy May 2018
I agree with Jeanne. Casting about and wondering what’s wrong is not good for your stress level. And assuming that Hospice will drug Mom up and let her die may not be the way it would go either. Please take everyone’s advice and call Hospice right away. And come back here as often as you can to let us know how you’re doing.

jeannegibbs May 2018
A lot of people (including me) would like to die in their sleep. Your mother is on hospice, and assumed to be close to dying. Sleeping may not be a bad condition for her, if she is not in pain and suffering. Please call the Hospice Help Line. If they suggest drugs, ask them what the drugs will accomplish. You are in charge of what drugs you give, regardless of their advice, but you might as well at least listen to their advice.

sguyton83 May 2018
I forgot to mention, about three days ago I gave her 1mg of adivan to help her sleep. She was crying and mumbling all night and wasn't able to fall asleep more than 5-10 mins at a time.

freqflyer May 2018
sguyton, thanks for the update. Since your Mom is in Hospice, that is a different ballgame. You don't call 911, you contact the Hospice 24 hour hot line and speak to the nurse telling him/her what is going on with Mom.

Don't ignore this, you don't want your Mom to be in pain as your Mom maybe automatically swallowing the water but it will just sit in her stomach and/or kidneys, and that would be painful for her.

Don't be surprised if your Mom is hiding her pain by sleeping. Some people just don't want to admit to family they are hurting, but will admit to a nurse. Don't do Mom a disservice, Hospice is there to comfort Mom.

BuzzyBee May 2018
Be there for her the best you know how.
But may be speak to a professional to see if you will be calling emergency services.

I would call them but as you said, you would be worried that they would say DRUGS. May be they can answer any questions you may have. I am sure they will have seen all stages of her illness before.

sguyton83 May 2018
The week before this happened she was making crying noises all night and all day. I just figured she was sleeping heavy now because she didn't sleep properly all last week. She is home hospice now and im worried if I call them they will just want me to drug her and let her die.
She doesn't speak, only swallows the water and goes back to sleep.

freqflyer May 2018
sguyton, I agree with Midkid above, call 911 immediately.

Sleeping for 2 days straight is not normal. Plus I would be concerned that any water given to your Mom would go into her lungs and she not be able to cough it out.

Midkid58 May 2018
Does she interact with you when you wake her up? Or just swallow the water and go back to sleep?

She may have had a stroke in her sleep, which you would not have noticed. I'd call 911 an get her checked out at a hospital, ASAP.

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