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Iloveyoumommy Asked June 2018

What constitutes misuse of a POA? Does POA have the right to tell hospice that they have to evoke required assisted visitation appointments?

Appointments to all other siblings and friends to see my dying mother? What constitutes illegal and misuse of a POA’s authority and boundaries, such as filling a TRO, threats of jailing siblings, bringing the law in with hospice to keep us from seeing our mom, extremely terrorizing siblings with very scary threats. And acting as his own lawyer. I have no money, what do I do? He is stealing money, and put an unqualified, non professional, non certified, with never doing this before ever. Has no schooling, and is holding my mom prisoner in her own home. Locking doors when we go there, hanging up the phone, won’t let mom talk to anyone! HELP ME PLEASE!!!

Countrymouse Jun 2018
Your brother, who has POA, is caring for your mother in her home, is that right? - or in his home? And she, very sadly, is entering the last stages of cancer.

This must be a time of complete nightmare for all of you. Including your brother. You are all under extreme stress and extremely upset; so it is not surprising that things quickly get out of hand.

The one thing that is clear is that *your* *mother* has the right to see her children if she wants to; and that she deserves to spend her time in love and calm.

What you had better do is call APS, explain the situation as calmly as you can, and ask if they can liaise with your mother's care team and through them with your brother to negotiate a schedule of visits.

I'm sorry for how frightening it must be to think of your mother being isolated in this situation; but I hope it will help if you try to take some of the stress off your brother rather than trying to wrestle him out of the way. That's the idea, anyway; and I hope the professionals will be able to help you with it. Best of luck, please let us know how you're getting on.

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