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Sherbear410 Asked June 2018

When I ask my dad questions he just shuts me down. Any advice?

He will say I don't want talk about it or I did not say that or remember that then deny saying things.

geewiz Jun 2018
Adding to above, it is difficult for someone with dementia to sort through a complex question. Their brain isn't working well. Often, simple yes/no questions are the best. I know for my MIL we couldn't ask where does it hurt --- we had to say does your head hurt AND point to her head at the same time. And then go through the likely places where she traditionally had issues.

HolidayEnd Jun 2018
He could be trying to conceal his memory loss by claiming he never said that, etc.

Or he really might not remember! Dementia is like that.

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BarbBrooklyn Jun 2018
So, Sherbear, your dad has dementia, correct?

Often, dementia patients DON'T remember saying things; he may in fact not understand what you're talking about. I found that when speaking to my mom, who had vascular dementia, I had to slow down and speak clearly and use fewer words.

One more thing. Discussing emotional things that are in the past? Probably not a good idea.

Countrymouse Jun 2018
What sort of subjects are you trying to discuss with him when this happens?

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