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benn2234 Asked June 2018

My wife who I love is at home with Hospice. How long can she go?

My wife is at home with Hospice coming out. She has lung cancer, her leg has turn black, she has not eaten nothing in 30 days nor BM in 30 days, and other things going on how long can she go?

BeKind21Another Jul 2018
I believe in telling someone it's okay if they go on. Assure her that you will be okay and that you love her and you will see her again. Also, sometimes I've seen that someone will wait until their loved ones are not with them before they go. Just some thoughts.

Patticake2 Jul 2018
Benn2234 My thoughts and prayers are with you. Thank you for your post and the loving devotion to your wife. May God grant you and your wife His Peace.

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smeshque Jul 2018
Praying for you benn.

benn2234 Jun 2018
GOD WITH US

Pepsee Jun 2018
Don't be afraid of the pain Benn. Cry it out. This may be the hardest thing you've ever done. But believe me, it's also the most beautiful. Relax and let her time come on her time table. You are one hell of a great husband!

SueC1957 Jun 2018
benn,
Do you believe in the afterlife (Heaven or another existence)?

I believe that, at our death, we will join our loved ones. There will be a temporary absence when one leaves before the other but Heaven is for eternity. I believe God meant us to be together always. The hard part is that, during the separation, we can't communicate with them. That's where trust comes in. Trust that your wife's soul will be well taken care of in your brief separation.

I pray for God's loving comfort to help you let her go, then may He surround you with His love during this difficult time.

I can see your pain. I wish there was something else I could say to make you feel better. (((Big hugs))) to you.

benn2234 Jun 2018
I love her so much I'm doing all that but it just hurts inside

blannie Jun 2018
Oh, Benn, I am so sorry you have to go through this. Have you told your wife it's ok for her to go? Be sure you tell her that. During my mom's last day, I played music she loved, talked to her, held her hand, sang to her and told her what a great mom she'd been. I'm sure your wife would like similar soothing words and music if she likes music. It's so hard, I know. {{{Hugs}}}

benn2234 Jun 2018
Just me and my loving wife it hurts

SueC1957 Jun 2018
Benn,
I'm so sorry for you and your wife. It sounds like the end is near (within days). It is amazing how long someone can survive without food.

By any chance, is she waiting for a family member or friend to arrive at your house? That is not unusual for a dying patient to "wait" to see or hear from someone close, then pass.

If I were you, I would spend her last days making her as comfortable as possible. Reassure her that you are there and love her. Holding hands can be comforting. Sometimes, soft music and soft lighting can be calming. I know how hard it is, as I was a hospice nurse.

God bless you both at this difficult time.

benn2234 Jun 2018
Hospice said any time but she still talking and know me its so hard

notrydoyoda Jun 2018
I am so sorry to hear this. Have you asked the people with Hospice how long they think she will last? If I remember correctly, the body can last 40 days without food before going into a starvation mode. We can't live anywhere near that length of time, however, without water.

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