Ahmijoy has brought up some good points. My Mom complained about everything (the food, the nursing staff, the therapists, etc.) when she first went into the nursing home for Rehab therapy. I talked frequently with the Nursing Coordinator (supervisor ) for Mom's Household (Nursing Unit), the Social Service Director and the therapists during those first few months. They were all helpful with suggestions as to how we could make Mom more comfortable. It took about 5-6 months before she settled down and did not complain as much. Now she rarely complains and she enjoys talking with the other residents on the Memory Care Unit (even when they didn't quite make sense to each other). Mom was moved there after therapy ended because she would wheel herself around the halls looking for my brother and me.
I listened as Mom vented her feelings and then told her that I understood and that we would see what we could do to make things better for her. That worked until she had something else to complain about and I would say the same thing again "that we would see what we could do".
It always takes time to get used to something "New" and "Different" and living in a nursing home is certainly different from living in your own home. You need to be patient and let your Mom acclimate to her environment. If you move her each time she complains, she will have the same complaints as she does now and your Mom will never "get used to" a facility and never find her "New Home".
Move your Mom only if you truly feel that she is not getting the care she needs [and only after you have talked with the Nursing Coordinator or Director of Nursing, the Social Service Director and the therapists]. Yes--there are "Bad" nursing homes, and this forum seems to talk about the bad ones more often than about the "Good" nursing homes. But if you give your Mom and the nursing home a chance, you just might find that your Mom is in a "Good Nursing Home".
I understand we’ve been raised to listen to our parents. Unfortunately there comes a time when they need to listen to us.
What have you observed at Mom’s rehab? How do they treat her? Is she well cared for? Does the staff treat her with respect and kindness? I can tell you she probably doesn’t like having the therapists tell her what to do. My husband didn’t. She probably doesn’t like the food. She just plain doesn’t want to be away from her home. Seriously, that is a very common complaint with our elders. And you can understand why.
Only move Mom if you, yourself feel she’s not recouperating or you’ve continually observed things you don’t like. Even then, speak with the nurse. Each facility has to have a registered nurse on duty 8 hours a day and an LPN on duty all the time. Speak with one of them. For serious issues, see the Director of Nursing.
If Mom goes to another rehab, her records will need to transfer and those therapists will have to evaluate her. It’s like starting at square one. I’m not sure how Insurance will cover a transfer. Then what if she doesn’t like THAT one?
Tell Mom you understand how she feels if she is cognitive of what you’d be saying. Tell her as soon as the doctor says she can leave, you’ll talk about it. That explanation is ok even if she’s not cognitive. Keep fibbing to her.
Sure you can, but be warned she probably won't like any facility. If you find the care she is receiving good then leave her where she is. Many here have dealt with similar and usually the parent just wants to be at home and doesn't understand why they need to be in rehab.
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My Mom complained about everything (the food, the nursing staff, the therapists, etc.) when she first went into the nursing home for Rehab therapy. I talked frequently with the Nursing Coordinator (supervisor ) for Mom's Household (Nursing Unit), the Social Service Director and the therapists during those first few months. They were all helpful with suggestions as to how we could make Mom more comfortable. It took about 5-6 months before she settled down and did not complain as much. Now she rarely complains and she enjoys talking with the other residents on the Memory Care Unit (even when they didn't quite make sense to each other). Mom was moved there after therapy ended because she would wheel herself around the halls looking for my brother and me.
I listened as Mom vented her feelings and then told her that I understood and that we would see what we could do to make things better for her. That worked until she had something else to complain about and I would say the same thing again "that we would see what we could do".
It always takes time to get used to something "New" and "Different" and living in a nursing home is certainly different from living in your own home. You need to be patient and let your Mom acclimate to her environment. If you move her each time she complains, she will have the same complaints as she does now and your Mom will never "get used to" a facility and never find her "New Home".
Move your Mom only if you truly feel that she is not getting the care she needs [and only after you have talked with the Nursing Coordinator or Director of Nursing, the Social Service Director and the therapists]. Yes--there are "Bad" nursing homes, and this forum seems to talk about the bad ones more often than about the "Good" nursing homes. But if you give your Mom and the nursing home a chance, you just might find that your Mom is in a "Good Nursing Home".
What have you observed at Mom’s rehab? How do they treat her? Is she well cared for? Does the staff treat her with respect and kindness? I can tell you she probably doesn’t like having the therapists tell her what to do. My husband didn’t. She probably doesn’t like the food. She just plain doesn’t want to be away from her home. Seriously, that is a very common complaint with our elders. And you can understand why.
Only move Mom if you, yourself feel she’s not recouperating or you’ve continually observed things you don’t like. Even then, speak with the nurse. Each facility has to have a registered nurse on duty 8 hours a day and an LPN on duty all the time. Speak with one of them. For serious issues, see the Director of Nursing.
If Mom goes to another rehab, her records will need to transfer and those therapists will have to evaluate her. It’s like starting at square one. I’m not sure how Insurance will cover a transfer. Then what if she doesn’t like THAT one?
Tell Mom you understand how she feels if she is cognitive of what you’d be saying. Tell her as soon as the doctor says she can leave, you’ll talk about it. That explanation is ok even if she’s not cognitive. Keep fibbing to her.
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